New topic
Printable| Author | Message |
Why Men are Just Happier People 
What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be prime minister. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO T-shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another petrol station toilet because this one is just foul. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress £3000. Dinner jacket rental -- £100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood -- all the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day holiday requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend. Your underwear is £4.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. 
You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original colour. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck. You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes one colour for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails with a pocket-knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache. You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 45 minutes. No wonder men are happier!!!  | |
- E-mail - orgNote -  Report post to moderator |
Gross generalisations.  | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Fauxie said: Gross generalisations.
 All true! | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
REDFEATHERS said: Fauxie said: Gross generalisations.
All true!unless you are  gay [Edited 3/29/05 0:19am] You CANNOT use the name of God, or religion, to justify acts of violence, to hurt, to hate, to discriminate- Madonna
authentic power is service- Pope Francis | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
REDFEATHERS said: Fauxie said: Gross generalisations.
All true!Most are, I must admit. I went down the list seeing if they were true for me, chuckling as I went.  | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
 | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Pretty much mostly true 
Except I have way more than 3 pairs of shoes and I would NEVER rent a DJ  Happy is he who finds out the causes for things.Virgil (70-19 BC). Virgil was such a lying bastard! | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
PANDURITO said: 
Oh yeah! | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
| Ex-Moderator |
PANDURITO said:  |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
PANDURITO said: Does he eat the phone? And then... from where does he retrieve said phone?  | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
REDFEATHERS said:
You can never be pregnant.  Come on... this must be possible! | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
| Ex-Moderator |
RocknRollisalive said: Does he eat the phone? And then... from where does he retrieve said phone? omg! I think he is eating the phone.  |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Yes, he eats the phone so you know where he gets it from 
It's the cycle of life | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
REDFEATHERS said:
What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be prime minister. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO T-shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another petrol station toilet because this one is just foul. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress £3000. Dinner jacket rental -- £100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood -- all the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day holiday requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend. Your underwear is £4.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original colour. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck. You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes one colour for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails with a pocket-knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache. You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 45 minutes. No wonder men are happier!!! STOP HATIN' we ARE simple creatures...don't you WISH you all could be so simple.... The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them. -- Mark Twain.
BOB JOHNSON IS PART OF THE PROBLEM!! | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
|
Out of the blue my other half just come home with some computer generated images of our kitchen. A new kitchen. "how do you fancy a new kitchen?" (i'm thinking i don't, it hadn't even crossed my mind and was the first i knew of this)
Now, i know we probably can't afford it at the moment,but if i flat out say no, i'm fucked. the reason i know this? i told her i'd definately think about it. You should have seen her face.
 |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
REDFEATHERS said:
What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be prime minister. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO T-shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another petrol station toilet because this one is just foul. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress £3000. Dinner jacket rental -- £100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. [b] One mood -- all the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day holiday requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend. Your underwear is £4.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original colour. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck. You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes one colour for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails with a pocket-knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache. You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 45 minutes. No wonder men are happier!!![/b] one moodd  thats definetly not true | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Marrk said: i'm fucked. the reason i know this? i told her i'd definately think about it. You should have seen her face.
 | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Well :
You can choose your last name. The kitchen is all yours. You consider the wedding as the highlight of your life, whilst we have to wait until out first mistress. Chocolate is good for every end of the emotional spectrum. You can be first lady. You have ovaries. You can wear a strapless dress to a black-tie occassion. You can wear NO brah to a black-tie occassion. Perfume sales women tell you the truth. The world is your sex-in-the-city. You never have to go to the toilet alone. You don't have to stop and think to do two things at a time. Same number of drinks, not paying the bill. You´re not frowned upon when getting cosmetic surgery. Wedding dress £3000. Cost of wedding party 25,000. People actually pay attention to what you say, even under the pretention of staring at your chest. The occasional well-ment headache is practically expected. New ties don't cut, blister, or mangle your throat. Mood swings which make the making-up part worth the arguing. there´s nothing to compare with phone conversations You know stuff about fashion. You have the natural ability to pack sufficiently for every event in a holiday. You can find not only your own but also your partners stuff. You get extra pay for the slightest hint of cleavage. If you forget to invite someone, this person will know he or she did something wrong. Your underwear always looks good (and clean  .
One car is more than enough. You almost never have scrotal-itch problems in public. You are unable to see the bottom of the credit card. You can put make-up on your face. You have the nerve and a working fashion-gland in your brain to change your hairstyle every other week. You do not have to shave your back. You can play with sex-toys all your life. Your looks usually hides your body-scent. You can wear a dress no matter how your legs look. You can do your nails. You have freedom of choice of actually asking your way when your lost. You actually have the stamina to go shopping for more than 45 minutes. No wonder women are happier!!! forgot_something_edit [b][Edited 3/29/05 10:54am] You don't scare me; i got kids | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
men are rational
women are emotional I sincerely wanna  the taste outta yo mouth!  CAN U RE L8? | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Do women take glee in this self-pitying, masochistic shit? I now this is supposed to be all fun and games, but this “women’s burden” crap is getting old. Break free of your oppressive female gender roles and gentility, and stop being a perpetual slave to consumer capitalism; then maybe you’ll be alot happier. [Edited 3/29/05 12:04pm] | |
| - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
