Kids!!! Where do they get some of the things they say from?

My 3 year old daughter was doing number twos on the toilet, the other day, and she wanted my help in cleaning her bum. So as I'm cleaning her...she pipes out with "Daddy....don't eat it!!!! It's yucky!!!!".



Where the hell would she even think about eating it?

Then the other day we were reading "The Little Mermaid" and about the handsome prince. So I was trying to teach her to say "Daddy is handsome".
So after a couple of goes, I think she's got it. So she runs up to her mum to tell her what we've been reading and I mention to her "Hey Mia..what's Daddy again?"
She looks at me...thinks for a bit...then turns to her mum and comes out with "Daddy's crazy!"



I swear she's got my sence of humour.

Any other kids stories?

Watch this thread die!

OMG I've got tons....


The funniest shit I've heard recently is ....

3.In the middle of taking a social studies mid term exam this kid turns to me and says " Who would win in a fight, a bear or a tiger?"

2. We are test prepping my kids hardcore for this crazy standardized test and I was working with this really low functioning student on this open ended question about optical illusions. I went on forever about how your eyes can be tricked how they are fun to look at, what the artist thinks as they create these pictures..... I basically feed him what I wanted him to write. He says he's got it. I say " Are you sure you know what you are gonna write?" He says yes repeats most of what I just told him back to me. I say ok...walk away...let him get to work...like 2 seconds later he raises his hand... I go over to him. He looks up at me and says " How do you spell groundhog?" OMG I almost died laughing.


1. I have this kid in my class who doesn't prounce the "l" sound, He has a little sister called Gracie. He came in one day screamming " Gracie broke Poppie's COCK!" Gracie broke Poppie's COCK!"


Turns out Gracie broke his father's alarm clock and he thought he was late for school.

althom said:

kids are SO funny ... she sounds adorable

my son Eliijah told me that as long as he says please i can't tell him no.

he also told me that babies come from the store and that i should go buy him a sister.

heybaby said:

Sweeny79 said:

my oldest Marquis can talk like Apu and mr. burns from the simpsons.

heybaby said:

No THAT'S something to be proud of!

I have two funny ones.

Once when my son was about 4 or 5, his mother and I were, um, having ..."relations"

really good relations.....LOL

Well, my son got up out of his bed, found his little toy lantern, turned it on to navigate the dark house to our bedroom, opened the door and proceeded to tell us to keep quiet because he was trying to sleep. Point taken CJ!!!!

The other one is my daughter likes to tell people, "My daddy is fat" Such a cutie pie, really.....

althom said:

I was like Tiger, most def.... the kid looked at me for a loooonnnngggg time then nodded his head and went back to work. Another kid looked up and says to me " You crazy."

My 3 year old cousin is cute and sayz and does funny thingz alot!!!

Once she had a toy mobile fone to her ear and she was walking around- just smiling...and then all of a sudden she blurtz out "Okay!! See you!! Bye bye!!!"

When she was about 1 yearz old, whenever my aunt (her mama) would sing "they take paradise and put up a parkin' lot" she'd sing "mmmmm Bup! Bup! Bup!"- this was adorablez!!

Once she just blurted out- out of nowhere "DVD PLAYER!!!"


I love her, she'z a cutie!!!

lilmissmissy said:

My son snuck in on his Nana while she was in the shower and decided to take some snap shots with the camera ...(she wasn't happy)

althom said:

I know- and u need see her facial expressionz too- she alwayz has this wide-eyed look about her and her mouth is alwayz partially open wif her lil baby teeth showing and she'z got these lil curlz!!!

She's so freakin cute- sometimez i go "IM GONNA GET YOU!!!" and i run and grab her and she SQUEALZ wif excitement!! And when i tell her she's so cute, she has this exaggerated giggle!!!

Ocean said:

Woooowwwooooo!!!!!

So are they hanging on the fridge with the kids artwork?

Ocean said:

OMG LMAO

Ocean said:

my middle son patrick tells people that god is good and asks alot of questions. we were invited to a church and while the rev was preaching Patrick stood up raising his hand. i sat him down and asked him what was he doing he said he had a question about God.

oh and if you ask he'll do the robot dance on the spot with no shame

althom said:

he's a big simpson and futurama fan. and yes he saw your avvie and said "whats Bender doing on there?!"

A couple of weekz ago my lil cousin blurted out "IT'S MY BIRTHDAY PARTY TODAY!!!" with da BIGGEST smile on her face!!! Only thing was it wasn't her birthday!!

heybaby said:

I ask myself that question sometimes.

I remember when I was 3 my mom saw me walking down the hallway with a loaded gun in my hand. It scared the crap out of her and she was pissed at my father. Not funny, but...

unlucky7 said:

no not funny. i don't even buy toy guns.

heybaby said:

My dad thought it was so cool to have one, I wonder if he learned his lesson.

I remember when I was outside I saw this boy around 6 or 7 playing with this toy gun that looked real, he was pointing it at his mothers face and acting like he was shooting her. I wouldn't buy any kind of toy weapon for my child.
[Edited 2/27/05 17:52pm]

When i was 3, my parentz took me to da Moomba Parade and there was a float with Big Bird on it!! I believed dat Big Bird knew who i was (cause ofcourse he could see me through da televisionz ) and i was like "BIG BIRD!!! BIG BIRD!!! I'TZ MEEEE!!! IT'Z MISSY!!!!" but ofcoure BigBird took no notice and i was very sad and i was goin 'round sayin "WHY DIDNT HE LOOK AT ME? " everyone thought it was cute- but dat was gawdamn traumatisingz

lilmissmissy said:

That is so damn funny

and very cute.
[Edited 2/27/05 17:53pm]

unlucky7 said:

How could Big Bird do dat to me??? HOW?!?

lilmissmissy said:

Is that lil Sachin!?

You've put him too close to the fire



(Well cute)

senik said:

Datz ME!!!