applekisses said:

But I feel personally, people who suck make beautiful people feel sceptical. A rose-tinted glasses thought I admit but hey.
[Edited 2/23/05 14:09pm]

JDINTERACTIVE said:

Or sometimes not so much skeptical but just realistic about things and trying to find a way to be happy the way things are instead of wishing they were different.

applekisses said:

Yeah, a lot do. Why can't I just meet one of the ones that don't.

1sexymf said:

I can't answer that, hon. I just know that your chances increase with the more people you meet. It's hard weeding through all those toads, though, isn't it?

applekisses said:

Thanks, Apples
It's not just not being a mother that scares me, I'm also so mad at myself for wasting so much time trying to prove my worth or how good of a person I am to someone who would never have saw it or appreciated it.

1sexymf said:

I can't answer that, hon. I just know that your chances increase with the more people you meet. It's hard weeding through all those toads, though, isn't it?

sag10 said:

I'm sorry to hear that you can't have children, Sag.
I should try to look at those situtations too, because someone else always has it worse than you do,
Thanks for the hugs -hugs right back

1sexymf said:

No time has been wasted. That time you "wasted" taught you some very valuable lessons on life. It would have been a "waste" if you ended up in a similar situation an thought it was better.

All things happen for a reason...good and bad. It's just how we end up processing them that matters.

You are my age...I certainly hope that there is more after 35 Goodness there is SO much to do!

Good luck to you and I hope you can find the happiness you seek outside and inside.

applekisses said:

That's what I said before. You can see why I feel like shit now? Honestly, I wonder why I bother sometimes.

1sexymf said:

Sag you can't have children? I'm sorry to hear that...see, I can't either so I know something of what you may be going through

1sexymf I don't have anything to add to the beautiful words that everyone else has written except these three - NEVER SAY NEVER

everything happens (or doesn't happen) for a reason...

applekisses said:

yeah, you have to kiss a lot of toads before you meet a prince. No pun intended.

JDINTERACTIVE said:

I guess it's just the way you said it...this part:

"...I guess you can always help yourself. Perhaps by going out more or something like that?"

sort of makes it sound like it's her fault for not being married/having kids...or that she's acting all helpless.
It's not what you said...I think it's the way you said it.

applekisses said:

Yeah, well I didn't say that and that's the problem on here. Did I ever say that? Did I ever come across as patronising? I gave her a hug and a rose...its an emoticon for fucks sake but what else could I give her? Im not speaking to her face to face am I? Maybe its because Im shy or people dont recognise an honest and genuine person that I am when they see one. In that case I should make the effort. How do you think I feel when someone I genuinly care about gets battered and bruised and treated like shit when I love them? I could love 1sexymf for all you know. If you want to know what I meant and that goes for anyone...ask me an Orgnote or Id gladly give you my number so I can tell you.

Anyway, I'll go and have a laugh and talk bollocks with Cloudy, Christopher and Lolly...on some random thread somewhere.

applekisses said:

Yeah, well I didn't say that and that's the problem on here. Did I ever say that? Did I ever come across as patronising? I gave her a hug and a rose...its an emoticon for fucks sake but what else could I give her? Im not speaking to her face to face am I? Maybe its because Im shy or people dont recognise an honest and genuine person that I am when they see one. In that case I should make the effort. How do you think I feel when someone I genuinly care about gets battered and bruised and treated like shit when I love them? I could love 1sexymf for all you know. If you want to know what I meant and that goes for anyone...ask me an Orgnote or Id gladly give you my number so I can tell you.

Anyway, I'll go and have a laugh and talk bollocks with Cloudy, Christopher and Lolly...on some random thread somewhere.

superspaceboy said:

Thanks Super. I don't feel like my life is over, it's just scary to think, I mean REALLY THINK about the future. I know I can't control it or see into it, but I do pray for better and good things down the road.
[Edited 2/23/05 14:26pm]

applekisses said:

Yeah, a lot do. Why can't I just meet one of the ones that don't.

JDINTERACTIVE said:

I guess it's just the way you said it...this part:

"...I guess you can always help yourself. Perhaps by going out more or something like that?"

sort of makes it sound like it's her fault for not being married/having kids...or that she's acting all helpless.
It's not what you said...I think it's the way you said it.

1sexymf said:

Sag you can't have children? I'm sorry to hear that...see, I can't either so I know something of what you may be going through

1sexymf I don't have anything to add to the beautiful words that everyone else has written except these three - NEVER SAY NEVER

everything happens (or doesn't happen) for a reason...

You girls are making me sad!

I hope you all do get the chance to experiance this. It's the most amazing and scariest thing I've ever gone through. You girls all seem very lovely and sweet and would make great mothers.

althom said:

yes, but they need to find some great potential fathers to hook up with first.

charlottegelin said:

Not really! I think a woman can do it alone without a guy these days. Obviously the guys haven't been that interested or committed to the relationship to even think about that stage.....but I can see these girl managing by themselves. Who said they need a man by their side?

althom said:

no man, it's WAY too hard. I would never do this alone even I had a really strong support network, but I am a wuss, so what do I know.

charlottegelin said:

Yeah..but you have more than one child. I think the girls were talking about having one child.

althom said:

you're absolutely right, one child... ahh, those were the days...

charlottegelin said:

I just finished reading Supa's thread on wathcing the birth of his nephew. I'm very happy for him. This however, just made me start crying. I'm crying because I fear that I'll never have an experience like thast. For years, I was in an abusive relationship. Many of you probably think 'why didn't you just leave, but it's not an easy thing ot do. If you haven't experienced it, then I can't explain it, but those that have unfortunatley experienced that know what I'm saying.
I'm 35 and would like to get married and one day have a child. I just feel like I have so little time left to do that and I don't just want to "settle" to say that I did it. When I hear about couples getting engaged, married, having children, etc. I'm happy for them but at the same time, it just makes me feel so bad. I feel like I wasted so much time in that bad relationship and my time is just about up. I'm not getting any younger and that amkes me feel twice as bad when I think about, which I try not to do. I try to think about things like there are men out there like Supa that do exist, but I'll never be fortunate to find someone that will love me unconditionally and fully and will I ever completely get over being afraid to trust.
I feel horrible for putting a damper, so to speak on Supa's thread, but if I didn't get this out in some sort of way besides crying, which I don't like to allow myself to do, I would feel even worse. And thanks to anyone who might take the time out to read this. It probably sounds like an aimless rant, but I had to get it out somehow.

charlottegelin said:

Not really! I think a woman can do it alone without a guy these days. Obviously the guys haven't been that interested or committed to the relationship to even think about that stage.....but I can see these girl managing by themselves. Who said they need a man by their side?

althom said:

AAAAAMEN!

Natisse said:

althom is saying all the right things again - watch out!