Post something funny ... or whatever


Dating . . . . In 1960


It's the summer of 1960 and Harold goes to pick up his date, Jerry Sue. Harold's a pretty hip guy with his own car and a duck tail hairdo.

When he goes to the front door, Jerry Sue's father answers and invites him in.

"Jerry Sue's not ready yet, so why don't you have a seat?" he says.


That's cool, Harold thinks to himself.

Jerry Sue's father asks Harold what they are planning to do.

Harold replies politely that they will probably just go to the malt shop or to a drive-in-movie.

Jerry Sue's father responds, "Why don'! t you kids go out and screw? I hear all the kids are doing it."

Naturally this comes as quite a surprise to Harold and he says, "Whaaaat!?"

"Yeah," says Jerry Sue's father, "We know Jerry Sue really likes to screw; why, she'd screw all night if we let her!"

Harold's eyes light up and he smiles from ear to ear. Immediately, he has revised the plans for the evening.

A few minutes later, Jerry Sue comes downstairs in her little poodle skirt with her saddle shoes, and announces that she's ready to go.

Almost breathless with anticipation, Harold escorts his date out the front door while Dad is saying, "Have a good evening kids," with a small wink for Harold.

About 20 minutes later, a thoroughly disheveled Jerry Sue rushes back into the house, slams the door behind her and screams at her father:

"Dammit Daddy! The Twist. . . . . it's called the Twist."

Some men have no idea when to keep their mouth shut

The young bride approached her awaiting husband on their wedding night
and demanded $20 for their first love making encounter. In his highly aroused
state, he readily agreed.

This scenario was repeated each time they made love for the next 30
years, him thinking it was a cute way for her to buy new clothes, etc.

Arriving home around noon one day, she found her husband in a very
drunken state. Over the next few minutes she heard of the ravages of financial
ruin caused by corporate down-sizing and it's effects on a 50 years old executive.

Calmly, she handed him a bank book showing deposits and interest for 30
years totaling nearly $1 million dollars. Pointing across the parking lot, she
gestured toward the local bank while handing him stock certificates worth
nearly $2 million dollars and informing him that he was the largest stockholder in the bank.

She told him that for 30 years she had charged him each time they had
sex, and this was the result of her investments. By now he was distraught and
beating his head against the side of the car.

She asked him why the disappointment at such good news and he replied, "If I had known what you were doing, I would have given you all of my business!"

Some men have no idea when to keep their mouth shut.

at all of these!

I can't, I am watching Stepmom and it is creating such saddness...

Freespirit said:

My child of the 90's....when my daughter was about 5 years old, she saw a picture of Arlington Cemetery.

She asked me what all the white crosses were for.

I told her that they were to mark the graves of the soldiers.

She wanted to know what a grave was.

I explained that was where they buried people when they die.

She wanted to know why they bury dead people.

Not having a good answer, I asked her what she thought they should do
with people when they die.

She pondered that a second and said "Recylce them?"

Pearle said:

Soylent Green is people!!...People!!...