Author | Message |
SERENITY NOW!!! - I JUST HIT A KID I just went to the store to get some food and there was this absolutely revolting child from hell. Whilst I was getting my stuff, I had already spotted her as she ramshacked through the store, pulling stuff out of the isles and screaming her head off. Mother, fcuz, was a doozer, steady snoozing her way through the grocery shopping. an autopilot Just my luck they ended up being right in front of me at the cash register. Mom was unloading her shoppingcart of it's 389 items, one item a time, a minute a piece. So this little devil spawn first became and then she started looking for something to divert her attention since mom was obviously not listening. The object of her newfound affection turned out to be me. As I felt goosebumps rise on my back and the hair stand up on the back of my neck, this little psycho eyed me with an look and then proceded to kick me in the ankle with the force of a grown man. I shouted "Hey, don't do that" as I grabbed my ankle and then she kicked my other leg. It was like a bad cartoon man. Mom pretended not to notice. So I pulled her jacket and said "hey, listen your kid is kicking me pretty fucking devilishly in the shins, aren't you gonna say nothing?" mom just went "I didn't see anything" was the replied that came from this wombat of a woman. Then she just turned again and kept slugging her stuff onto the conveyor belt. all the time, the kid just stood there being As soon as she'd turned around, the kid decided it would be fun to tick me off some more. So she spat out her gum into her hand and proceded to push it into my jacket along with a hand full of her devil phlegm. Inside my head a voice was now steadily and loudly yelling at me "SERENITY NOW - SERENITY NOW - SERENITY NOW" I felt myself going So I tried to reason with her once more and said "please, don't do that, I haven't done anything to upset you so why do you hit me like that and now you put gum on my jacket. I think that is a very nasty thing to do and I don't like it". her double reply to this: I tried to control my anger, but alas, it was too late and I got a big bag of sesame bunns from my cart and gave the little fuckster a right big thump on the side of the head, which swerved her off balance and made her land on the floor. There, I thought, that will teach you. But no, to my surprise she didn't heave a sigh but simply got up and spat at me!!! a big fat wallop of spit dripping down my stomach. She quickly turned around to face her mom, waiting for me to yell, fcuz and then to act all innocent as if she'd done nothing. But I said to myself, "alright you little devil's bitch, I can play that game if you can". And so I very carefully grabbed a strand of her hair, about 6 or 7 hairs in total and janked them out of the back of her head. She belted out so loud at this unexpected strike that the whole damn store stopped breathing. Except for her mother who just went When mom had finally payed for the shopping, the kid turned to me one final time and said "you are a big homo" I just got back home and I'm still telling myself "SERENITY NOW" damn I should have just got a big pot of vegetables or ketchup or something and thrown it all over the little psycho. Is that wrong of me? And was it wrong to punch her upside the head with a bag of breadrolls? I hope not because somewhere deep inside I'm still wishing I'd have hit her with a frozen leg of lamb [Edited 1/20/05 10:34am] and true love lives on lollipops and crisps | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
This is the best thing I've read all week! You did the right thing! What a little psycho! Can you imagine what she'll be like when she's a teen? | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
applekisses said: This is the best thing I've read all week! You did the right thing! What a little psycho! Can you imagine what she'll be like when she's a teen? I think she'll be in jail for multiple murder by the time she hits puberty and true love lives on lollipops and crisps | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
That lil bitch needs SSB's Tobasco remedy Christian Zombie Vampires | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Can't. . .stop. . .laughing. . .*gasp*
That's fucking awesome. But yeah, you should have hit her with something hard. Geezus. | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Ex-Moderator | tackam said: Can't. . .stop. . .laughing. . .*gasp*
That's fucking awesome. But yeah, you should have hit her with something hard. Geezus. totally!! |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
superspaceboy said: That lil bitch needs SSB's Tobasco remedy man, she had such an evil twisted look in her eyes, I swear she probably drinks that stuff with some of her demon mates, just for kicks and true love lives on lollipops and crisps | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
I couldn't even read the entire post.....what a horrible child
And for the mother to completely disregard her childs actions!!?? They'll get what's coming to them Smooches;) [Edited 1/20/05 10:52am] | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
awwwwwesooooome. | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
as a mother of boys.....you should have smacked her harder nah just kidding but the mom should have done something...I was at a record store last weekend and the store had a used turntable that I was looking at.. I asked the sales person if he could hook it up to see if it worked..while he was hooking it up my boys were looking at cds being good..Then this woman came next to me with her son to listen to a used cd...the guy got the turntable hooked up,gave me some head phones and had me put one of the albums I was getting ready to purchase to see if the turntable worked...I was not paying attention and this kid started messing with the bush that was there to wipe dust off albums..think it was one of my boys I said..."please don't touch that" and realized it wasn't even my kid...The mom gave me a funny look and I said I was sorry and thought it was one of my boys(he was the same height as my third son) She said it was ok and then went back to listening to the cd..So after I put the album back in it's sleave and was looking closer at the turntable this same kid started touching it and tried to touch the needle case I turned to him AND his mother and said lol "please tell your son to stop." Again she gave me a funny look and said nothing to him..My boys came over saw what was going on while I was unhooking the turntable. My 13 year old turned to me at the counter and said very loudly.." I'm glad my brothers don't act like that bratt over there." I paid for my stuff trying not to laugh and went to the car.. I told my 13 year old he shouldn't have said that so loud but he was right...If you are going to take your kids shopping with you pay attention to your kids [Edited 1/20/05 10:56am] | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
That story just had me in stitches! I can picture the scenario at the check-out, you having a face off stare ( ) with the sperm of the devil!..... complete with the Omen theme tune ringing out loud in the background "..My work is personal, I'm a working person, I put in work, I work with purpose.." | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
while that story is hilarious.. first off that mother should be ashamed of herself..
2nd that little brat, needs to be taught a lesson.. stooping to her level isnt' the answer, but when she phsyically touches you, all gloves are off.. no reason for it at all. Especially if the mother isn't paying the least bit of attention... Not for nothing, but i probably would put a hand full of spit in my hands and whipped it across her face.. then kicked her right back... I have no patience for kids like that and less patience for mothers like that.. Me and the mother would of had soem serious words.. I woudnt' of let her look away and say i didn't see anything.. Now while i know she is little... I bet you could probably have the survailance tape pulled and wonder if you could charge a complaint against the mother and child? basically that is harrassment.. that would teach that bitch a lesson.. The day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom - Anais Nin
"Unnecessary giggling"... | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
EverSoLesa said: as a mother of boys.....you should have smacked her harder nah just kidding but the mom should have done something...I was at a record store last weekend and the store had a used turntable that I was looking at.. I asked the sales person if he could hook it up to see if it worked..while he was hooking it up my boys were looking at cds being good..Then this woman came next to me with her son to listen to a used cd...the guy got the turntable hooked up,gave me some head phones and had me put one of the albums I was getting ready to purchase to see if the turntable worked...I was not paying attention and this kid started messing with the bush that was there to wipe dust off albums..think it was one of my boys I said..."please don't touch that" and realized it wasn't even my kid...The mom gave me a funny look and I said I was sorry and thought it was one of my boys(he was the same height as my third son) She said it was ok and then went back to listening to the cd..So after I put the album back in it's sleave and was looking closer at the turntable this same kid started touching it and tried to touch the needle case I turned to him AND his mother and said lol "please tell your son to stop." Again she gave me a funny look and said nothing to him..My boys came over saw what was going on while I was unhooking the turntable. My 13 year old turned to me at the counter and said very loudly.." I'm glad my brothers don't act like that bratt over there." I paid for my stuff trying not to laugh and went to the car.. I told my 13 year old he shouldn't have said that so loud but he was right...If you are going to take your kids shopping with you pay attention to your kids
[Edited 1/20/05 10:56am] you're absolutely right. the ones we met happened to be kind of naughty kids (well mine was flat out evil lol) but I always sympathise with little kids I see in the mall on saturday, being pushed about in little carts, tired and hungry and their parents yelling at them everytime they open their mouths. If you have kids and you take them shopping I think you have a responsibility to a)make sure they don't mess with other people but also b)are ok and feel comfortable and are made a part of the shopping instead of being treated as an inanimate object to push about all day. that's just sad for many kids. and true love lives on lollipops and crisps | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
That is hilarious. I'm sure it wasn't funny at all at the time, but the way you tell the story. And, the mother should be ashamed of herself. | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
IstenSzek said: EverSoLesa said: as a mother of boys.....you should have smacked her harder nah just kidding but the mom should have done something...I was at a record store last weekend and the store had a used turntable that I was looking at.. I asked the sales person if he could hook it up to see if it worked..while he was hooking it up my boys were looking at cds being good..Then this woman came next to me with her son to listen to a used cd...the guy got the turntable hooked up,gave me some head phones and had me put one of the albums I was getting ready to purchase to see if the turntable worked...I was not paying attention and this kid started messing with the bush that was there to wipe dust off albums..think it was one of my boys I said..."please don't touch that" and realized it wasn't even my kid...The mom gave me a funny look and I said I was sorry and thought it was one of my boys(he was the same height as my third son) She said it was ok and then went back to listening to the cd..So after I put the album back in it's sleave and was looking closer at the turntable this same kid started touching it and tried to touch the needle case I turned to him AND his mother and said lol "please tell your son to stop." Again she gave me a funny look and said nothing to him..My boys came over saw what was going on while I was unhooking the turntable. My 13 year old turned to me at the counter and said very loudly.." I'm glad my brothers don't act like that bratt over there." I paid for my stuff trying not to laugh and went to the car.. I told my 13 year old he shouldn't have said that so loud but he was right...If you are going to take your kids shopping with you pay attention to your kids
[Edited 1/20/05 10:56am] you're absolutely right. the ones we met happened to be kind of naughty kids (well mine was flat out evil lol) but I always sympathise with little kids I see in the mall on saturday, being pushed about in little carts, tired and hungry and their parents yelling at them everytime they open their mouths. If you have kids and you take them shopping I think you have a responsibility to a)make sure they don't mess with other people but also b)are ok and feel comfortable and are made a part of the shopping instead of being treated as an inanimate object to push about all day. that's just sad for many kids. Amen or c)leave them at home with a sitter | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
I can't believe how some children behave! It makes you really wonder what kind of IQ the parent/s have. to have allowed their kids to grow up behaving in such a way. That little monster will likely always remember the encounter with you. She can reflect back on it to pass the time when she's in women's prison in a few years... | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Tom said: that's her! well, I figure that's what she'd look like on one of her good days when she was well tempered and true love lives on lollipops and crisps | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
SnowQueen said: That little monster will likely always remember the encounter with you. She can reflect back on it to pass the time when she's in women's prison in a few years... carving my likeness into the wall with a dull razor and true love lives on lollipops and crisps | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
IstenSzek said: applekisses said: This is the best thing I've read all week! You did the right thing! What a little psycho! Can you imagine what she'll be like when she's a teen? I think she'll be in jail for multiple murder by the time she hits puberty You did a public service! | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
applekisses said: You did a public service! and true love lives on lollipops and crisps | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
I'm not sure. hitting the kid doesn't do much help, since she's a brat and will just hit back again. I say hit the mother. She seems to be the one who needs some spanking. | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Still. . .laughing. . .
Just the image of you whacking the kid upside the head with a bag of rolls. . . oh. . . oh dear. . . Heavenly is right. Should have hit Mom next. | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Heavenly said: I'm not sure. hitting the kid doesn't do much help, since she's a brat and will just hit back again. I say hit the mother. She seems to be the one who needs some spanking.
Good idea | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
Um yeah.....no, it's never okay to strike a child in anger. Maybe a better course of action would have been to move to another check out. Or better yet, slap that cow of a mother up side the head!
(sorry someone had to say it) | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
tackam said: Still. . .laughing. . .
Just the image of you whacking the kid upside the head with a bag of rolls. . . oh. . . oh dear. . . Heavenly is right. Should have hit Mom next. I'll go back to the store same time next week and if I catch them I'll slap them both with a few ounces of chicken fillet and true love lives on lollipops and crisps | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
IstenSzek said: tackam said: Still. . .laughing. . .
Just the image of you whacking the kid upside the head with a bag of rolls. . . oh. . . oh dear. . . Heavenly is right. Should have hit Mom next. I'll go back to the store same time next week and if I catch them I'll slap them both with a few ounces of chicken fillet FROZEN chicken fillet. | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
tackam said: FROZEN chicken fillet. well, I guess it's only a small step from frozen chicken fillet to heheh. two bricks right in the rot for mom and devildaughter and true love lives on lollipops and crisps | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
All I know is, if my kids act like that, they get their butts hawled out of there immediately. How parents can allow that kind of behavior is beyond me. Do not hurry yourself in your spirit to become offended, for the taking of offense is what rests in the bosom of the stupid ones. (Ecclesiastes 7:9) | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |
IS THIS FOR REAL???? Still mazed and laughing my ass off! I'm picturing the spoiled girl from Willy Wonka. http://elmadartista.tumblr.com/ http://twitter.com/madartista | |
- E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator |