Nothinbutjoy said:

Miguel

Nothinbutjoy said:

Pretty scary, huh?

bkw said:

Exactly.

Part of why I watch Supernanny is to understand why these kids act this way and how to react. I don't understand my brother & sister in law's parenting style.. at all. My niece is very intelligent but can be a downright brat sometimes and *I* want to say something. She used to bite kids at day care.. and totally abuses the family dog. My brother tells her in a stern voice NOT to hurt the dog, but she giggles and does it anyway. ANd continues to do it. I want to hit my niece and show her how it feels! But my brother says hitting her would only reinforce bad behavior. So how do I deal?

Shaming used to be big when I was a kid.. my mom used to count to three... at 2 1/2 I was behaving alright. I asked her the other day.. "what happened at three? did u ever spank me?" she said, that's the sign of a good parent - you don't remember if i spanked you" I was sure afraid of getting ot three though.. hmmm, i wonder if parents now are spread too thin that they don't give enough attention to the kids, causing them to act up?

Look, I saw the title of this thread and was all prepared to come on here and gripe about nobody should ever be hit (unless they are consenting adults who ask nicely ).

But come ON. This kid deserved a bag-o-buns upside the head. That's not to say it was right. It's to say that she DESERVED it. It's a subtle difference.

Ever seen the Chris Rock bit, ". . .but I understand". . .? Totally apropo.

IstenSzek said:

I think I love you.


Good for you! I would have done the exact same thing.

IstenSzek said:

I didn't think it could get funnier!!

IstenSzek said:

No more, please!!!

TheRealFiness said:

bkw said:

Ya know what, B? I was a neglected kid. I did not go into to stores having hissy fits and misbehaving. Yeah we could blame the parent but you can be damn sure that kid knew right from wrong. If the demon seed would have hit me, I would have hit her ass back. It's very obvious the parent isn't disciplining the kid. It takes a village.
[Edited 1/20/05 16:58pm]

Parents like that shouldn't be allowed to procreate. They're only dumbing down the gene pool.

I'm shocked that the mother didn't hear her kid cry out much less give a shit. It was the mum who deserved a slap in my opinion..

If my kid misbehaved like this in public I would deal with them..this mother obvioulsy wasn't..While I can understand the anger and frustration that was felt..still, I would go ape if anyone hit my child. Absolutely.

Telling them off..sure...but a stranger striking them would be absolutely out of the question regardless of what they had done.

Sorry, it's not a popular opinion but

I wouldn't hit anyones kid no matter what and would expect the same back.
[Edited 1/20/05 17:25pm]

Lleena said:

Damn rational Orgers!!

MrJoker said:

I keep saying that one should have to fill out an application to have a kid..like make it ILLEGAL to have them unless the parent (s) and fit and can take care of kids financially.

but NOOOO. noone listens to my voice of reason.

Neversin said:

kids cant be expected to rationalise a situation the way an adult would. I dont believe you should expect them too or react to them in the same way you would to an adult. Age does make a difference and it should..HOw can you NOT take into the account the mental capacity of a child..you should!

Sorry, can't condone it, no matter how humorously it was described here...

There are too many ways of dealing with this without having to stoop to the level of an obviously emotionally and spiritually neglected little girl...your issues were actually with the mother, because her actions have dictated her daughter's behavior. Not knowing what this family's story is, all I can think is that neither them nor you were served very well by deciding that anger justifies physical violence...that little girl may have been using physical violence against you for that very same reason, anger. Only her anger may be a mask for insecurity, fear, lonliness..whatever it is she is experiencing within her living environment.

Better to have changed checkout lines, felt some pride in doing the right thing...and said a silent prayer for both these obviously lost souls.

MIGUELGOMEZ said:

mine too! plus she would say (in swedish so no-one would understand) in a really pleasant voice "I'll cut off your ears with a rusty bread knife!"

Lleena said:

Absolutely spot on.

If anyone touched my kids then.....

TheOrgerFormerlyKnownAs said:

Stymie, I know what you are saying, but there are different forms of neglect and abuse. Not every kid will act the same way. I think this kid just wanted attention that her mother (and probably father I'll bet) doesnt give her. I blame the parents, they are the ones that need to be hit across the chops. Not the victim.

Byron said:

Well said Byron.

i would be upset if a stranger hit my child...but that wouldn't happen 'cause i keep my boys in check. that kid deserved something. no "oh sweety thats not right" or "your gonna need a timeout" sounds far beyond this child. my kids have gotten spankings but its rare 'cause they know mama and daddy don't play that. yes ma'am and yes sir are in order. why is it that back in the day people knew how to raise kids and now all of a sudden everybody needs help?

see this got me. when i was working at osco drug store, this woman came up to me and asked me to help her with her child. so i'm thinking the kid is hurt or something. i come over and the kid is sitting on the floor. she says "he won't get up" then she says "honey, it's time to go we have to leave now". so she looks at me like 'see he won't listen'. i just say "pick him up and carry him out" so then she does this and that's the end of that! i just thought it was really stupid. pick his ass up and take him out. you are the parent and he is the child.

heybaby said:

You have your kids call you "sir" and "ma'am"?

p.s this may be an American thing I suppose?
[Edited 1/20/05 21:45pm]

heybaby said:

Are you trying to make the argument of good parenting for us? Of course that is the answer! Why hit the victim in the story given above?

bkw said:

I've seen a few parents in America do that but it's not a really common thing...at least not here in Florida. Maybe more in the midwest.
Here it's generally seen as a little...you know... :cuckoo: No offense Heybaby

bkw said:

they call us mom and dad but when we call them for something or they are answering a question we ask they say "yes sir" to their dad and "yes ma'am" to me. its called respect. my oldest child gets straight A's and my two youngest get A's and B's. they all get awards for being good in school and being responsible. How do they get rewarded? they have a xbox and gamecube and plenty of toys and a huge library of books that i buy and collect from librarys that give away books. my kids don't get spankings unless its really major like going somewhere and i didn't know (my oldest and middle did this once and only once) we respect them and love them. they know this so they respect me and know that what we do is to make them better adults and able to stand on their own two feet.

heybaby said:

That's why I added in the comment about it maybe being a cultural thing.

I dont agree with spanking kids but i wont get in that argument again because I think we have to agree to disagree on that one.

superspaceboy said:

That will teach her wait till it all comes out of her as she shits

I called my parents by their names, was spanked maybe twice ever, was grounded maybe 4 times (each time the grounding was lifted after an hour because my dad felt bad), never really had any punishment, never had a curfew, and I always got straight A's- I even went to many academic competitions including the Math Bowl, the Creative Writing Contest, and won the county Spelling Bee. I was Respected and therefore gave respect in kind- without having my spirit broken. Being respected made me respect myself and that made me behave better, and made me so grateful that I wanted to thank them by rising to the occasion. Remember that more than just about anything, kids want to be adults, or at least treated like adults.
It's a shame when people don't see how they can have the best of both worlds in a situation, especially when it involves innocent children at their mercy.

Have you ever thought about how European children tend to be more mature than American kids? Don't get me wrong, I love America and everything, but kids are given more respect and given more freedoms at earlier ages. There is psychology you can work with.


P.S. This is not a question or argument pointed to anyone in particular.
[Edited 1/20/05 22:06pm]

luv4u said:

Oh I was talking the other way around. Had you read what my remedy is? I had posted it on the Super Nanny thread. I had said just a dab to the anus will teach her a lesson she'll never forget. Forget the mouth...go for the jugular.