Anyone who has strays hanging around their neighborhood will find this to be extremely handy...


1. Stray cats will not be fed.

2. Stray cats will not be fed anything except dry cat food.

3. Stray cats will not be fed anything except dry cat food moistened with a little milk.

4. Stray cats will not be fed anything except dry cat food moistened with warm milk, yummy treats, and leftover fish scraps.

5. Stray cats will not be encouraged to make this house their permanent residence.

6. Stray cats will not be petted, played with or picked up and cuddled unnecessarily.

7. Stray cats that are petted, played with, picked up and cuddled will absolutely not be given a name.

8. Stray cats with or without a name will not be allowed inside the house at any time.

9. Stray cats will not be allowed inside the house except at certain times.

10. Stray cats will not be allowed inside the house except on days ending in "y".

11. Stray cats allowed inside will not be permitted to jump up on or sharpen their claws on the furniture.

12. Stray cats will not be permitted to jump up on, or sharpen claws on the really good furniture.

13. Stray cats will be permitted on all furniture but must sharpen claws on new $114.99 sisal-rope cat-scratching post with three perches.

14. Stray cats will answer the call of nature outdoors in the sand.

15. Stray cats will answer the call of nature in the three-piece, high-impact plastic tray filled with Fresh'n'Sweet kitty litter.

16. Stray cats will answer the call of nature in the hooded litter pan with a three-panel privacy screen and plenty of head room.

17. Stray cats will sleep outside.

18. Stray cats will sleep in the garage.

19. Stray cats will sleep in the house.

20. Stray cats will sleep in a cardboard box lined with an old blanket.

21. Stray cats will sleep in the special Kitty-Komfort-Bed with non-allergenic lamb's wool pillow.

22. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed.

23. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed, except at the foot.

24. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed under the covers.

25. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed under the covers except at the foot.

26. Stray cats will not play on the desk.

27. Stray cats will not play on the desk near the computer.

28. Stray cats are forbidden to walk on the computer keyboard on the desk when the human is sdfjjhhkl;ljfd.; oier'puyykmm4hbdm9l o9jmdskdm,. USING IT

That's cute. The one that made me laugh the most was the last one. My youngest cat (a former stray) loves to walk on my keyboard. In fact, he presses so many keys simultaneously, he makes it beep.

Very sweet

My littlest cat likes to sit on my lap and watch things happen on the screen. One of these days I'll have to make one of those threads with nothing but moving emoticons to make him happy

this is the sweetest thread!

Stray cats will take over the world

Yeah, I wouldn't let these guys walk on my keyboard!

JediMaster said:

AWWWWW!!!!!

JediMaster said:

psychodelicide said:

the guy on the right is a cutie

the last one got me because my cat (a stray once) is asleep riht where my mouse is and when i try to move her over she just goes right back to where she was.

Lovely, Nikster - really funny

In South Korea, it is common to eat cats and dogs. This is not done in a humane manner, but by torturing them to death by hanging, strangulation, and beatings with such objects as bricks, large rocks, heavy rod-like objects and electrocution. They do this for long periods of time in order to terrorize and cause great suffering to the animal. Many South Koreans believe the flesh from an animal who is tortured to death has aphrodisiac qualities and tastes better.

Dead cats are cooked along with ginger, dates and chestnuts to make a brown paste or "Liquid Cat" which is foolishly thought by many South Koreans to be a remedy for rheumatism and joint problems.

That's terrible, those poor animals. If I saw someone tormenting a cat or a dog, I would start tormenting THEM.
[Edited 11/18/04 8:19am]

hehehe...my kitty was a stray, but he doesn't really have "stray"-type tendencies. when i first got hohner he wasn't neutered, but he never sprayed in the house like i thought he would (thank gawd). that, and he's gotta be like the only stray cat that i've ever seen/known who's actually affectionate.

Handclapsfingasnapz said:

my stray is the same way. i think she must have lived in a house before she came to me. she's the sweetest thing and loves to cuddle. she wasn;t spayed when she arrived but the vet at my job said that it looked as though she never had a litter. She's probably the best thing that happened to me since I've moved to brooklyn.

she also will only scratch her scratching post.
[Edited 11/18/04 11:29am]