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How do you help a guy who's losing the plot? ..not in a jokey way, but serious..
We have a guy at work who seems to be close to a breakdown. He came in today, went out on a call that he seems to have failed to complete (or even begin, maybe) and came back making no sense at all and looking like he was about to slash his wrists... He called his parents in the middle of the night this week to come and help him, and they live about 3 or 4 hours away. It seems to stem from a relationship thing, but he's blowing things way out of proportion and normally that would do my head in, but in this case it's a genuine mental problem rather than an ego trip... What do we do?!?! Dunno if he's coming in tomorrow, or ever again...do we call him and talk to him or leave him to work it out...? [Edited 10/27/04 8:52am] | |
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put out You'll never know a girl called Nikki and you'll never find Erotic City | |
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Start recruiting | |
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mdiver said: Start recruiting
[flame snipped -Tom] | |
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Fucking hell man.... this is serious...
You'd expect some constructive help on this one..... | |
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RocknRollDave said: ..not in a jokey way, but serious..
We have a guy at work who seems to be close to a breakdown. He came in today, went out on a call that he seems to have failed to complete (or even begin, maybe) and came back making no sense at all and looking like he was about to slash his wrists... He called his parents in the middle of the night this week to come and help him, and they live about 3 or 4 hours away. It seems to stem from a relationship thing, but he's blowing things way out of proportion and normally that would do my head in, but in this case it's a genuine mental problem rather than an ego trip... What do we do?!?! Dunno if he's coming in tomorrow, or ever again...do we call him and talk to him or leave him to work it out...? [Edited 10/27/04 8:52am] Convince him to get therapy. |
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I avoided answering, because it's a real tricky one. I don't envy your situation. Telling someone to go for therapy isn't constructive (at first). If you genuinely care for the person and think they need help, just offer a shoulder. Ask if he wants to go for a drink or a coffee, he might be lonely which is exacerbating his mood. If you are in a junior position at work, advise his superior as it could come under occupational health.
Sorry I can't be more help, I have no experience to draw on for this one. For those of you who missed my shiny helmet.... | |
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RocknRollDave said: mdiver said: Start recruiting
[don't quote flames! -Tom] a helping foot 
hehehe., ehehe. but seriously this is a job for your manager/personnel director. talk to him or her and let your concerns be known. if you're afraid to do this for some reason there's always the old tried and true "hey joe (insert name of afflicted co-worker) wanna go grab a coffee with me? so how're things going?" approach | |
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Ace said: Convince him to get therapy.
Sure, and let him get brainwashed by some no good money grabbing therapist... RocknRollDave said: We have a guy at work who seems to be close to a breakdown. He came in today, went out on a call that he seems to have failed to complete (or even begin, maybe) and came back making no sense at all and looking like he was about to slash his wrists...
Sounds like plain stress to me... Let him breakdown, might do him good... If he wanted to kill himself he would have done it without people knowing or suspecting a thing, if he still tries it then he's just weak and then it's just a cry for attention and you should just neglect people like that... He called his parents in the middle of the night this week to come and help him, and they live about 3 or 4 hours away.
Well, no need to worry then is there... At least he tried to get some help from people he trusts and isn't too proud to ask for help... It seems to stem from a relationship thing, but he's blowing things way out of proportion and normally that would do my head in, but in this case it's a genuine mental problem rather than an ego trip...
He'll get over it... What do we do?!?!
Nothing it's not your problem so don't meddle with it, for all you know you could make it worse... If he wants your help he'll ask for it or start a conversation about it... Neversin. O(+>NIИ<+)O
“Is man merely a mistake of God's? Or God merely a mistake of man's?” - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche | |
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THIS ONE EASY PUT ECSTASY TABLET IN GUY COFFEE THEN HE ALL HAPPY! POOK GET THAT IDEA FROM BAD BOY TWO WITH MARTIN LAWRENCE P o o |/, P o o |\ | |
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thank you for taking this seriously. i agree with Predom and XX, reaching out to him in a fairly casual way (dinner, coffee, etc.) would be a very good thing. i wouldn't bring up therapy until he's confided in you about what's going on - even then he might still take offense (that stupid macho "i ain't crazy" thing). if you have a suicide hotline in your area, you may want to call them and ask them for some advice. i hope all works out well! | |
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Neversin said: Ace said: Convince him to get therapy.
Sure, and let him get brainwashed by some no good money grabbing therapist.. Let me rephrase that: Convince him to get therapy from a good therapist. Don't tell me you are anti-therapy? You're not a Scientologist, are you? Is this Tom Cruise? |
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Well, I take it you live in America. Help for mental illness is hard to find there. Your best bet would be to get him to a psychiatrist somehow (although they are ridiculously expensive in the U.S.), not a psychologist, just in case it is shizophrenia or manic depression or something similar. There he should receive a diagnosis, from which point he can go for a second opinion at a psychologist if needed. That's how I did it. | |
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Ace said: Let me rephrase that: Convince him to get therapy from a good therapist.
Don't tell me you are anti-therapy? Pretty much... A stranger doesn't have a clue what's going on inside another strangers head no matter what some bullshit theory book says... People who go to therapy only go there because they're insecure and because they're too stupid to take a minute to just THINK... You're not a Scientologist, are you?
No, I'm not some weak fucking idiot... Is this Tom Cruise?
Are you Barbara Streisand? Neversin. O(+>NIИ<+)O
“Is man merely a mistake of God's? Or God merely a mistake of man's?” - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche | |
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Ace said: RocknRollDave said: ..not in a jokey way, but serious..
We have a guy at work who seems to be close to a breakdown. He came in today, went out on a call that he seems to have failed to complete (or even begin, maybe) and came back making no sense at all and looking like he was about to slash his wrists... He called his parents in the middle of the night this week to come and help him, and they live about 3 or 4 hours away. It seems to stem from a relationship thing, but he's blowing things way out of proportion and normally that would do my head in, but in this case it's a genuine mental problem rather than an ego trip... What do we do?!?! Dunno if he's coming in tomorrow, or ever again...do we call him and talk to him or leave him to work it out...? [Edited 10/27/04 8:52am] Convince him to get therapy.  Yep...
There was something similar going on with a guy at my former workplace (heard it from some friends there) and they had to go to his apartment and get him to go to the hospital. The best bet would be to go to his place and if he's freaking out take him to a hospital. Most hospital emergency rooms have a psychiatric crisis center (at least the organization I worked for did -- I used to work in the mental health field) and they will diagnois him and set up aftercare for him. I'm sorry your friend is going through this.  Hope it gets better. | |
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I'm on the flip-side of this...
My employers actually sent me to a therapist a couple of years ago. I hate psycho-babble but had to endure it for an hour a week, weeks on end. I've freaked out a lot at work. I've walked out about four times but they've always asked me to come back. The best thing you could do for this person is take him to a bar, buy him a drink and lend him your ear. | |
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Neversin said: Pretty much... A stranger doesn't have a clue what's going on inside another strangers head no matter what some bullshit theory book says...
People who go to therapy only go there because they're insecure and because they're too stupid to take a minute to just THINK... Okay - whatever you say. 
Are you Barbara Streisand?
 Memmmm-ries, like the corner of my miiiind... |
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