The ones that make someone else go "DAYUM!!!"

I just shared this one in another thread...

*Now that I think about it, my mom's b/f owned 2 hideouslyatrocious vehicles...the other was a van. Big Blue. He didn't like the original color, but was too cheap to take it to get painted. So he had us (family project) paint it...with freakin' house paint and rollers!! This god-awful thing had paint brush strokes showing and was sky blue, not your ordinary car colors. DAYUM!


*One from my wife's side: One of her Uncles was very inconsiderate, very uncaring in his youth...he was also a hunter, hunting deer, rabbit, whatever.
His daughter had a pet rabbit. Well, I don't know why, but he one day decided to kill and cook the rabbit...WTF!!! But, he went to step further...DAYUM!...he then decided to serve her pet to her as dinner, without telling her until she had eaten some of it, THEN he told her. Well, she immediately ran to throw up...What the HELL???
[Edited 10/13/04 16:11pm]

there was this one time when i was a kid when my stepmother (who liked to referr to herself in the third person as "cher-babe") took me and my infant half-brother grocery shopping and she accidentally locked my half-brother in the car with the keys. She then proceeded to have a meltdown in the parking lot during which she screamed at the top of her lungs, "THIS IS SUCH A FIESTA!!!"



if only i'd had a sombrero at that moment in time.

Anxiety said:

Hide and seek with my brother. He shoulda stayed out of the dryer.

And there was one time we had BLT's for dinner. My dad had left the pan of grease out for us (me) to clean. I had a habit of pouring dish soap in the pan to let it soak a bit. My brother comes up and sees a lil piece of bacon in the grease and eats it (don't ask me why). Now it was soaking in soap, mind you. He spits out the piece (or ate it...don't recall) and starts freaking out a little bit. Now for some brilliant reason he decides to not drink water but place his tounge on the metal bar in the freezer and it sticks and he freaks out more...but it's not completely stuck and he tears his tounge off of it...leaving a tiny piece of tounge stuck. ANd then he was bleeding...it was a mess. I was laughing so hard I could not help.

After (a few years), we were watching A Christmas stroy and well...you know the rest. Thing is he had seen this movie before but I suppose that Freezer metal and frozen flagpole are two different things and he didn't make the connection.

He's an easy target for good times.

Here the link to the whole sordid story:

http://www.livejournal.co...17536.html

My great grandfather was Jack the Ripper



I never leave home without his tailbone!

IstenSzek said:

Aren't they unsure of who exactly Jack The Ripper was? There is a likely possibility but its not definitivly accepted as the absolute solution to the crimes.

Before I was old enough to start school, I would be at home all day with my mom while my dad was at work and my sister and brother were in school. Whenever I started to act up, my mom would tie me to a chair and make me watch the Young & The Restless with her because I HATED soap operas. For some strange reason, the theme song to that show puts me to sleep almost instantaneously.

OK this isn't family related cuz the guy was not part of my family but it did happen at my aunts house so....

My aunt was a single mother and used to have lots of drifters in the house. Mainly to give her some income. My cousin Terry invited his friend to live there for a while. This guy was just a total loser. Drank, did drugs, high school dropout. One time I came home to my aunts and he was raving. "There's never any food in this house. There's nothing. What's a guy have to do to get some milk around here!" and with that he picked up one of the mother cats that just gave birth and sucked on her teets for milk!!

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

DAYUM!

Ages ago, a relative of mine had a kid by an NBA star.

Revolution said:

This one reminds me of the story of "Maynard"

My brother-in-law grew up on a farm and his mom was from Poland...well, he and his brothers had a pet goat named Maynard...and one day they were called in for dinner and they were having goat...once the kids put two and two together they all started to cry But, they couldn't leave the table until they ate.

[Edited 10/15/04 18:22pm]

Revolution said:

That's cold!!!!!

One more...

I grew up in Toledo, OH...urban setting for sure.
We're Mexican, and my mother had contact with some local Mexican families
who had crossed the border illegally...
We were invited to their house one day when I was about 9 yrs old. We don't
go in their house, but head directly to the garage, where there are other
people hanging around inside the garage walls.

Then I hear motorcycles revving their engines in the alley right outside of
the garage. LOUDLY!

So we're set up for the main event...

Up pulls a van to the garage door, and out comes a huge pig! He's running around the center of the garage while people, including myself, are scrambling to higher ground. WTF?

So this pig is running around and in walk these 3 guys with huge knives...
They take turns slicing the pig, meanwhile, the motorcycles' purpose becomes clear to me ...they are there to drown out the noise of the squealing pig!

I'm still not sure if my mom knew what was going to happen that night (God, I hope not), but I don't remember eating any of that pig.

DAYUM!

AprilMichelle said:

Well....I had to take a gander at your journal....pure curiosity...all I can say is....WOW.....How did you turn out so normal????

My gran shits her pants, as she eats bacon.

years ago i am told hans's family made their way into our country.

his father was a milkman, who was tragically murdered in his sleep.

his mother a doctor, not unlike myself looking for truth in medicine.

i am told when hans was quite little a dog made it's way into the lab.

his father was about to make his rounds and his mother was out.

evidently his mother was working on a top secret project, or so i am told.

his farther lifted the curtain, there was a flash of light and then nothing.

hans's father was killed instantly. hans does not know this truth.

i learned of it by accessing his mother's secret documents.

it is a wonder what chewing gum and patience can achieve.

as for myself...well-i am not too far removed from a certain scientist.

that name is
[Edited 10/17/04 19:59pm]

Kellie said:

aww..thanks you called me normal.....most people look at the angry bi chick w/ rainbow hair and a slight alcohol/cigarette/swearing problem and normal is not what come to mind lol

AprilMichelle said:

Hey..No problemo.....if your biggest crime is alcohol,swearing,cigarettes & rainbow hair.....ummmm there are alot more worse things you can be...Hey..diversity is great, it's what makes people interesting....cool!

Kellie said:

Aww Kellie you are my new favorite. BTW my journal is there for peeking and feel free to come visit it when ever you want....you seem like a lovely and sweet person

AprilMichelle said:

:wave2:Hi April! Awww you are too kind ....I do mean that though...I try not to judge anyone, unless it's something that sends me and I can't help myself...hey, all of us are a little in one way or another...right??? lol! Well great to meet ya...