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16 signs your cat may be trying to kill you
15. Unexplained calls to F. Lee Bailey’s 900 number on your bill. 14. He actually does have your tongue. 13. You find a stash of "Feline of Fortune" magazines behind the couch. 12. Cyanide pawprints all over the house. 11. You wake up to find a bird’s head in your bed. 10. As the wind blows over the grassy knoll in downtown Dallas, you get a faint whiff of catnip. 9. Droppings in litter box spell out "REDRUM." 8. Catch him with a new mohawk looking in the mirror saying, "Mew looking at me? Mew looking at me?" 7. Takes attentive notes every time "Itchy and Scratchy" are on. 6. You find blueprints for a Rube Goldberg device that starts with a mouse chased into a hole and ends with flaming oil dumped on your bed. 5. Has taken a sudden interest in the wood chipper. 4. Instead of dead birds, leaves cartons of Marlboros on your doorstep. 3. Ball of yarn playfully tied into a hangman’s noose. 2. You find a piece of paper labeled "MY WIL" which says: "LEEV AWL 2 KAT." ... and the Number 1 Sign Your Cat May Be Planning to Kill You ... 1. Now sharpens claws on your car’s brake lines. | |
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That's cute! RIP, mom. I will forever miss and love you. | |
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Hey, what's with all the feline threads tonight
Oh, the shirt, I have not forgotten. It's going out this weekend. Keep an eye out for it. Ohh purple joy oh purple bliss oh purple rapture! REAL MUSIC by REAL MUSICIANS - Prince "I kind of wish there was a reason for Prince to make the site crash more" ~~ Ben |
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I'm bored | |
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Nikster said: I'm bored
Go change the kitty litter, feed and water the cat. Don't give it a bath. Ohh purple joy oh purple bliss oh purple rapture! REAL MUSIC by REAL MUSICIANS - Prince "I kind of wish there was a reason for Prince to make the site crash more" ~~ Ben |
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luv4u said: Nikster said: I'm bored
Go change the kitty litter, feed and water the cat. Don't give it a bath. I already did. He tried to take a shower with me today...not a good thing | |
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Nikster said: luv4u said: Go change the kitty litter, feed and water the cat. Don't give it a bath. I already did. He tried to take a shower with me today...not a good thing He thinks he is human Ohh purple joy oh purple bliss oh purple rapture! REAL MUSIC by REAL MUSICIANS - Prince "I kind of wish there was a reason for Prince to make the site crash more" ~~ Ben |
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luv4u said: Nikster said: I already did. He tried to take a shower with me today...not a good thing He thinks he is human Well...he sure as hell ain't a loofa. | |
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Nikster said: luv4u said: He thinks he is human Well...he sure as hell ain't a loofa. Hey Nik Some of you orgers are so deceptive.....using my styles like a contraceptive.... | |
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sinister said: Nikster said: Well...he sure as hell ain't a loofa. Hey Nik Hey sinister | |
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luv4u said: Oh, the shirt, I have not forgotten. It's going out this weekend. Keep an eye out for it.
I just saw that...woohoo!!! | |
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Nikster said:
15. Unexplained calls to F. Lee Bailey’s 900 number on your bill. 14. He actually does have your tongue. 13. You find a stash of "Feline of Fortune" magazines behind the couch. 12. Cyanide pawprints all over the house. 11. You wake up to find a bird’s head in your bed. 10. As the wind blows over the grassy knoll in downtown Dallas, you get a faint whiff of catnip. 9. Droppings in litter box spell out "REDRUM." 8. Catch him with a new mohawk looking in the mirror saying, "Mew looking at me? Mew looking at me?" 7. Takes attentive notes every time "Itchy and Scratchy" are on. 6. You find blueprints for a Rube Goldberg device that starts with a mouse chased into a hole and ends with flaming oil dumped on your bed. 5. Has taken a sudden interest in the wood chipper. 4. Instead of dead birds, leaves cartons of Marlboros on your doorstep. 3. Ball of yarn playfully tied into a hangman’s noose. 2. You find a piece of paper labeled "MY WIL" which says: "LEEV AWL 2 KAT." ... and the Number 1 Sign Your Cat May Be Planning to Kill You ... 1. Now sharpens claws on your car’s brake lines. | |
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Nikster said: 11. You wake up to find a bird’s head in your bed. aaaaah aaaaah aaaaah! (i am quoting MADHOUSE quoting THE GODFATHER) yes SIR! | |
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Ex-Moderator | Nikster said: 8. Catch him with a new mohawk looking in the mirror saying, "Mew looking at me? Mew looking at me?" |
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