Domestic Abuse.......A Survivor's Story.

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Reply #120 posted 09/27/04 1:36pm

tackam

bananacologne said:

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

Nans

Thank you for sharing this story. I'm glad that you learned something from it nod

I totally remember that fear. I got to the point that I would not even make eye contact with people because to my boyfriend, that was a sign that I was guilty. It just became easier to not even acknowledge others, he couldn't say I was flirting.

It is amazing how quickly you find yourself in a trap? It really is like the frog in the pot. You know, the story of the frog who is swimming around in a pot of water. A small flame is lit under it and is turned up ever so slightly. The frog doesn't even notice the heat at first and because the water feels so comfortable. But over time the increasing heat makes the water boil and the frog never knew it was in danger. It's almost as if you wake up one morning and wonder how in the world you got to where you are.

You know what else I discovered? That people don't necessarily even have to come from bad backgrounds in order to fall prey to an abuser. All it takes is for someone to be vulnerable, and for someone to slip through that opening, no matter how small it is.

Nans, I hope that you can reconcile things with Danny, if nothing more at least on a friendship level. The void that you feel is awful and not one I want my friend to have. Love you hug

Thanku Richard - Im still waiting 2 hear if He's got my recent card 2 Him - I know it hasnt been signed for yet, and is at their local delivery depot awaiting their pick-up and signature. I just hope his family hasnt moved - not being able 2 reconcile this will leave this wound open and bleeding 4 years 2 come otherwise - hell, it's been well over 2 already, and it still dominates many (surprisingly different) aspects of my life, and of course, my personality.

Like u yourself said in your recent org note, this reconcilation will make sense of a lot of things, and put things back on track again. Don't get me wrong, there is a lot of good in my life, but when there is a gaping chasm in your life with nothing that comes close 2 filling it what DO u fill it with?

HOPE. Hell, it's all I have. x

You're both so lovely to share of yourselves like you do.

hug

I've been listening to this Sarah McLachlan song a lot lately. . . :

"Deep within I'm shaken by the violence of existing for only you. I know I can't be with you. I'll do what I have to do. Oh, I know I can't be with you. I do what I have to do.

But I have the sense to recognize that I don't know how to let you go."

- E-mail - orgNote -

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Reply #121 posted 11/03/04 3:50pm

SupaFunkyOrgan
grinderSexy

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I sent this to my best friend, the one that I finally convinced to leave her girlfriend and move away with me. She left me a message that made me cry:

Hey Rich, it's Beth.

Um, I just wanted to uh (this is how far she got before breaking into sobbing tears that lasted the rest of the call) to let you know that I thought your article was, was beautiful. I'm sorry that both of us had to go through so much pain and it brought back so much memories. We didn't deserve it, at all. And I never ever want to be friend with Paul or that Liza again. I thought it was awesome. I shared it with my friends at work. Thank you so much for writing it, it's really important to me that you wrote that. Well, that's it babe. I love you and I'm glad you had the strength to walk out and help me walk out. I'm glad all those years are gone. We deserve better and we'll get it, I know we will. Alright, I love you. That was awesome. More power to you. Ok Bye.

I love you Beth hug

2010: Healing the Wounds of the Past.... http://prince.org/msg/8/325740