Even if it could only be Once?

No! I really wouldn't do that! And I don't understand when I hear about other people even seeing people who are married (albeit unhappily).

I'm totally into Monogamy, because I respect relationships and their boundaries!

That also means I find cheating DESPICABLE.

No comment.



Ok, maybe him:

No ..... NO!!! (and in case you didn't understand me the first 2 times.....


HELL NO!












.
[Edited 9/5/04 19:52pm]

Zelaira said:

absolutely not...ever

I've seen firsthand the damage that being unfaithful can do both to the two people involved and to the children...it's something you never ever forget no matter how hard you try and you'll regret it for the rest of your life

And like HOLLYWOOd STARS give a Good Damn Huh? Sleeping with EVERYBODY"S HUSBAND.. Ya Kidding me ?? Look at how many Old Time Stars did Others Dirty and look at ANTONIO with Melanie. EVERYBODY Has Affairs ya Know or is like doing some Menage. All these Stars saying they have No one but still having Sex. Cracks me Up. As a Lay person maybe ya wouldn't but CELEBRITIES do ALOT of FOOLINg AROUND and TONGUE KISSING...LOL...

No.

No. I'm not anywhere near perfect but I do have a little integrity and respect for the meaning of marriage.

Cheaters disgust me, as does anyone who would cheat WITH a married person (and I don't buy into that crap justification of "Well, *I'm* not the married person so *I'm* technically not doing anything wrong!" or "their marriage is bad anyway")

Not if she's still living with him.

J0eyC0c0 said:

You're sure a man of ethics, aren't you?

the org is amazing

loadsa people have affairs and not one of them post on here i feel so humble in your presence.

I think yes it is wrong, and it should be avoided, But sometimes things happen that are just too weird, too beautiful to understand and then i think it would be more wrong to fight it than to maybe re-evaluate a failing relationship.

"fooling around" with married people is wrong but if it's special i think thats different

so go on and shoot me

lollyp0p said:

Life is what happens when you're filing divorce papers.



(So hurry up.)

CinisterCee said:

subhuman09 said:

nutter!!!

lollyp0p said:

but happy.

subhuman09 said:

so answer the question nutter, would you fool about with a married woman/penguin????

and i will really not accept NO COMMENT such a cop out


Personally i can see both sides and I'm currently having a lovely argument with myself which makes me feel kinda mentally ill,

but come on share with the group

lollyp0p said:

As much as I might want to-if there's kids involved I wouldn't.

That kind of thing has happened to me before though-I like to think I made the right choice.

The married penguin thing is a whole other issue though.



I see both sides too, I just hope there's an option of couple therapy before new coupling begins.

subhuman09 said:

ok so your saying it's not so much the fact that it is the married thing thats the problem, but innocents getting hurt?

Hmmmm i don't know

all i do know is that yes it is wrong but .....

forget it there shouldn't be any buts, but there is

lollyp0p said:

If someone's unhappy in a marriage I'd hope they'd talk about it before they go off and have an affair-but it does happen even if they tell the spouse about it.

Innocents are part of it I think, yeah, cause it's more than one person's decisions that affect things.

There's always a loophole that people justify it to themselves with-but it's all that person-I don't think it's completely cut and dry, there's a lot of gray depending on seperations, or if they said "fuck you" I'm outta here.

I personally think it's a bad idea, but given the right housewife I could change my mind.

subhuman09 said:

YES THERE IS NEVER JUST BLACK AND WHITE

LIFE IS NEVER WHAT YOU THINK IT IS GOING TO BE AND YOU MAY REACT TOTALLY DIFFERENTLY IN AN ACTUAL SITUATION TO HOW YOU THINK YOU MAY REACT, THE BRAIN IN A WONDERFUL ORGAN, BUT IT GETS REALLY FUCKED UP WITH HORMONES AND EMOTIONS


these threads are too black and white and very judgemental, i feel things happen for a reason, my dad was married when he met my mother and he had two sons, it may have seemed wrong at the time but he left his wife for my mom and they are still married 25 years on. If that hadn't have occured i wouldn't have been here and that would mean my kids wouldn't be here and that isn't the way i want things to work out



just cause society thinks it is wrong you have to trust you instincts and do what you feel right.....


i probably make no sense what so ever

lollyp0p said:

i think you're absolutely dead-on. it's a lot easier to view this as an either-or issue, but a lot of times, situations are far more complex.

irresistibleb1tch said:

I agree with both of you. Everybody has their own story-good and bad comes out of it.

Part of life-you can't spend your life planning what not to do-you try to do the best you can with the situation you're given.

to lollyp0p


for irresistibleb1tch

(Time for another round me thinks.)

irresistibleb1tch said:

i agree too. that's pretty much what i was trying to say by going , but i accept that was not the most coherent way of saying it.

life is so much more complicated than giving a point blank no. sometimes you don't make the rules, you can't.

and anyway, i wouldn't be here if my mum and dad hadn't done just that, so thanks guys for cheating!

I have met this man. He is so amazing.

He's married, but I don't care. He treats me very well, takes me places, takes care of me and the intimacy is beyond compare.

I see him every day, and we fool around a lot.

I don't care what others think, he's married and I have no problem with it.

Oh yeah, he's my husband! Ha-Ha!

lollyp0p said:

never thought id say this...but i kinda agree

I did already, once and never again. NEVER. EVER. Yes I am ashamed.

Life is not black and white.

I believe we should set boundaries from the start! Not messing with married individuals in my life is certainly one of them! It's not about judging other people (Personally, since this thread asked for views if it was taken personal then I would say it is personal conviction kicking in.) If they want out of their present relationship then I believe they should do that first! If they are unsure then it isn't the time to be mounting someone else. (Emotionally or physically)
Ending up in a relationship with someone who was still married has odds I wouldn't take. There is a greater likelihood that when your own relationship takes a rough patch they would take similar steps. If they did or did not in all honesty what is the first thing on your mind when they are late? Being in the salon industry for 20 years has taught me a lot! I work with 150 men and woman as well. I counsel with woman I have such a heart for.... The stories always run somewhat the same.... She doesn't understand him, she has let herself go, she is mean to him..... My concern is always for her as she embarks on what I see as a minefield that she has less then a 10% chance of getting through and more then likely odds of taking on great damage in the meantime.... I always ask the same things

1) If she is so horrible why doesn't he settle it BEFORE moving forward with you? Oh he stays for the kids (Great, and we know that kids are entirely self absorbed and never pick up on adult matters... ) Raising children in a loveless marriage is always a better roll model!

2) Do you feel you are "special" That it won't happen to you to one day? Can you honestly tell me that if you too are slightly off your game or your focus shifts (as life does) you won't be worried the same will happen to you? There is an inherent integrity and trust issue built into a relationship that begins this way...

3) Don't you worry what comes around goes around? I mean whatever principles you live by are the same ones that tend to reoccur in your life no matter what your belief system!

My position is always the same! You are worth so much! Why sell yourself short? Tell him handle this business and come back when he has. If he does you have set a precedence that will be wonderful. If not you may have saved yourself a whole lot of unnecessary pain.

I did have someone lie to me once.... It came out rather quickly that he was married. He may be a great guy eventually but at that point he lied to me. I can't trust the life decisions he makes! It hurt but I bet it hurt a whole lot less then it would have had I stayed!

Its all about you baby! Set yourself up for success! There is enough railing against you in this world as it is without you setting up a two point shot against yourself.


Again these are my views. I'm not out to preach a concept at anybody! Just to share my ideas.