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![]() [Edited 9/2/04 5:55am] "Pedro offers you his protection." | |
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S & M
One day Mom was cleaning Junior's room and in the closet she found a bondage S&M magazine. This was highly upsetting for her. She hid the magazine until his Father got home and showed it to him. He looked at it and handed it back to her with out a word. So she asked him, "What should we do about this?" Dad looked at her and said, "Well I don't think you should spank him." i love that one!!! you're only as old as you feel..............so how old do i feel Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants. | |
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have you heard the joke about the dyslexic who walked into a bra? [Edited 9/2/04 8:24am] | |
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A woman was in a coma. The Nurses were in her room
>giving her a sponge bath. > > >One of them was washing her private area and >noticed that there was a response on the monitor >when she touched her. They went to her husband >and explained what happened, telling him, "Crazy >as this sounds, maybe a little oral sex will do >the trick and bring her out of the coma." > > >The husband was sceptical, but they assured him >that they'd close the curtains for privacy. The >hubby finally agreed and went into his wife's room. > > >After a few minutes the woman's monitor flat lined, >no pulse, no heart rate. > > >The nurses ran into the room. "What happened?" they >cried. The husband said, "I guess she choked." | |
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One day, a little boy wrote to Santa Clause, "Please send me a sister."
Santa Clause wrote him back, "Ok, just send me your mother." How do you know a blonde's having a bad day? Her tampon's behind her ear and she can't find her pencil. A few days before his proctological exam, a one eyed man accidentally swallowed his glass eye. He was worried for a while, but there were no ill effects, so he forgot about it. Once he was in the doctor's office, the man followed instructions, undressed, and bent over. The first thing the proctologist saw when he looked up the man's arse was that eye staring right back at him. "You know, " said the doctor, "you really have to learn to trust me." | |
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madminx said: A woman was in a coma. The Nurses were in her room
>giving her a sponge bath. > > >One of them was washing her private area and >noticed that there was a response on the monitor >when she touched her. They went to her husband >and explained what happened, telling him, "Crazy >as this sounds, maybe a little oral sex will do >the trick and bring her out of the coma." > > >The husband was sceptical, but they assured him >that they'd close the curtains for privacy. The >hubby finally agreed and went into his wife's room. > > >After a few minutes the woman's monitor flat lined, >no pulse, no heart rate. > > >The nurses ran into the room. "What happened?" they >cried. The husband said, "I guess she choked." | |
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TheJourney4all7 said: One day, a little boy wrote to Santa Clause, "Please send me a sister."
Santa Clause wrote him back, "Ok, just send me your mother." | |
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SINNER IN CONFESSION BOX: forgive me father for i have sinned.i masturbate,shag,suck cock and love to have a dildo shoved up my arse.i think i might be gay.
PRIEST: is that you frog? | |
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cammille said: SINNER IN CONFESSION BOX: forgive me father for i have sinned.i masturbate,shag,suck cock and love to have a dildo shoved up my arse.i think i might be gay.
PRIEST: is that you frog? *
I don't see nuttin wrong wida lil Shuck & Jive* | |
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lollyp0p said: A blonde suspects that her boyfriend is cheating on her, so she goes out and buys a gun.
She goes to his apartment that same day, with the gun in hand. Sure enough, when she opens the door, she finds her boyfriend in the arms of a redhead. She points the gun at her boyfriend at stares him down for a moment. Then, suddenly, she's overcome with grief, so she puts the gun up to the side her head. Her boyfriend screams, "Honey, don't do it..." The blonde yells back, "Shut up! You're next!" | |
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SONofaBUSCUITeater said: cammille said: SINNER IN CONFESSION BOX: forgive me father for i have sinned.i masturbate,shag,suck cock and love to have a dildo shoved up my arse.i think i might be gay.
PRIEST: is that you frog? | |
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cammille said: SINNER IN CONFESSION BOX: forgive me father for i have sinned.i masturbate,shag,suck cock and love to have a dildo shoved up my arse.i think i might be gay.
PRIEST: is that you frog? okay, painful though it is, and embarrassed as i am to face the truth, i have to admit i find that very funny. | |
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Thanks you guys I needed a good laugh | |
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