I was talking to Byron the other day and was telling him how I am taking a closer look at my life and trying to determine the steps to take so that I am secure in the future. Since leaving my husband last year, I'm pretty much starting over from scratch... pretty much along the lines of young kids graduating from high school... or so it seems to me.

I had happened to drive by an older couple sitting on their porch, sipping drinks and reading and wondered if I'd ever be able to retire at the rate I'm going... which is a huge "no". lol... so, I've decided to take a closer look at things as of late... Oddly enough, Byron said that he was thinking along those lines as well... trying to determine which steps to take in his life right now... now, we're not sure if it's just a Leo thing and the stars have us kitties looking into life a little deeper or if it's a cycle that perhaps others are on as well...

Anyone else going through some life changes?

Yes. I dont know where me and my partner stand. I really want 2 move out, but i know he dont want me 2 leave...and i dont wana leave because if i do im not being with him anymore. We have no trust in the relationship.

yep, absolutely...going through the same thing now too (with the life direction, that is, not the partner)
[This message was edited Tue Jul 13 16:25:26 2004 by Natisse]

I'm thinking about gender re-assignment.

pretty much, yes.

I have been through several tough life changes in the not too distant past and it's no joke. I stood back, took time out and decided to do what I wanted to do...for my own personal development and find a more fulfilling way through life...It worked wonders. Sometimes people pay too much attention to attaining the perfect relationship when it's themselves they should be paying attention to.
Look to what you want in your heart,...not what you think others expect from you.
It's amazing what treasures can come your way when you,re not looking for them.
Patience is a Virtue.....be virtuous.

doctormcmeekle said:

for a third time??

where you find the cash, i do not know.

The past year of my life has been full of the doubt that you speak of Azure

I always figured I'd be married by now. That once I got settled in at school things would be all sunshine kittens and rainbows...

But....

Things are not always what you expect.

I left the man I thought I would marry, (and in the process I have freed myself from a lot of expectations I held over my own head, I have grown so much more comfortable in my own skin because i feel that I do not have to live up to any of my own self imposed rules), and I'm thinking that I'll go back to school to become an art therapist and leave the teaching profession in a few years.

Thankfully I have had Byron's friendship as well to help me through the rough spots, and to share the joyful moments with as well!

Change is hard but we are better off to go with it instead of resisting it. Life is a cycle of changes. The best we can do is be consistent and honest with ourselves (and those around us) and have faith that we are on the right path.

The universe does speak to us daily, and if we listen, things are sure to turn out fine.

I have no expectations now. I am free.

TheFrog said:

It's now so often I can't remember what sex I was in the first place!








my-keyboard-is-not-working-properly-edit.
[This message was edited Tue Jul 13 16:39:20 2004 by doctormcmeekle]

paisleypark4 said:

Leave him. It will be hard but it will be worth it.

Azure

Let's move our lives in that direction...lol

Sweeny79 said:

Sweeny

You've helped me thru many a rough spot as well...

Byron said:

Sweeny79 said:

HI HONEY

nesseone said:

Hey Sweets

Totally in the midst of a quarter-life-crisis, methinks. I have no CLUE if it's on track. I don't know what it would mean TO know.

Oh well.

so far things seem to be going well and according to plan. i'm done with college and on my way to veterinary school, or at least applying to veterinary school, and relationship-wise things are looking up.

perhaps in another ten years or so i'll be pulling out my hair and wondering what the hell i'm doing with my life but i hope not.

I'm feeling back on track for the first time in a couple of years.

I made the decision to return to L.A. Within 2 weeks, I had a job offer. I was struggling financially in Denver, and within a couple of months, I'll be completely out of the hole and have some savings. Everything seems to be clicking for me right now. I don't know exactly where it's gonna take me. And that doesn't bother me. Letting go of the idea of "doing the right thing" has freed me in ways I never imagined possible.

My belief in faith has also changed dramatically. I am thankful for all I have, and all that I am, in a way I never have been before. Life is good.

I'm feeling restless. Career-wise I'm not going in the direction I want to be and I'm not really sure what direction that is. Part of me wants to pack it up, quit everything and be a full time student, but I can't even focus enough to choose one thing to study.

As for the rest of life, well, it's pretty good. I should be saving more for my future, but I am saving something so I'm not doing too badly. I have fabulous friends, my health, a new apartment in August ( ) and all that.

CarrieMpls said:

it's the last part that's the most important.

There comes a time in life when we all have to get off the tractor..so to speak...

2the9s said:

wouldn't you say that the time has come for you? come on 9s, get off the tractor. it's the right thing to do.

JasmineFire said:

oh, it's so true. And I'm constantly reminding myself of that. But sometimes it's tough not to dwell on the tough parts, ya know?

JasmineFire said:

Never!!

Count me in. I am right there in personal growth ville and it hurts but it's put me on track!

CarrieMpls said:

yup. don't need to tell me twice.

2the9s said:

i think i'm in the MIDST of personal growth (and yes, i'm a LEO)...i feel like i went through a period of stagnancy, fear and just overall ickiness for a couple of years, and at the end of this past winter i decided it was time to knock it off with the moping already and get some shit moving. so this spring i started improv classes at second city (something i've been meaning to do ever since i moved to chicago three years ago) and for the first time ever in my life, i started working out regularly.

i'd love to say that my writing is flourishing and that i'm working on a ton of fabulous creative projects or that i have a fantastic dreamy boyfriend or that i'm on the road to a higher tax bracket...hell, i'd just love to say that i found a really cool pair of pants...but those things will come in time, just as i feel my life slowly but steadily improving as a result of the changes i've made this year.

another important change i made this year was just a very simple decision to quit being so critical of my new surroundings and just let myself be receptive to everything that chicago's about. my last relationship was with someone who was very anti-chicago and in fact moved to NYC as soon as we broke up...i realized that i had a lot of residual snootiness that had rubbed off on me, and that i really needed to jettison that stinkin' thinkin' that was more my ex's issues than mine in the first place. as a result, gee, go figure - i'm making lots of new friends this summer, and doing lots of fun stuff in my spare time. who'da thunk it?

i think my next big change is going to have to be finding a new job. working nights makes it really hard to have a social life, and being relatively new to the city still, i'm learning that's not a good thing. also, i've been in similar jobs to the one i'm at now, and i've been treated a lot better...except for the fact that my pay right now is VERY competitive for what i do....so they "got me" there.

I'm feeling pretty on track these days...I just FINALLY completed my bachelors degree and after a lot of stress and doubt and confusion, I've figured out a plan to get my license (in social work) and found a way to make it somewhat affordable. So, careerwise I feel I'm in a really good place.

Life at home is good too. Me and my hunny are headin towards our 9th year together. The house we own is good and now that I'm done with school I will finally have some energy to do improvements I've been thinking about for a few years.

I'm rapidly approaching my 30th birthday (I'm a Leo too) and although I have some apprehension about that, in many ways I'm happy. I set some tough goals for myself at age 25 (to accomplish by my 30th bday) worked my ass off and accomplished them. It feels really good.

I've got a fun life and tremendous support from the most fabulous group of friends ever.

I've started back to the gym and lost about 1/3 of the weight I gained in the past few years of schooling and working all the time.

The only question mark in my life now is what to do with myself now that I have free time again. For the past years I've completely neglected MY writing since I was forced to write paper after paper after paper. I'm feelin the need to tap that part of myself again but have yet to find the inspiration to do so. I guess I just need to start doin it

You know...I always feel that I'm in a state of "life change" ...it could be my own doing because I'm always looking for ways to improve my situation. It can really be exhausting and it sometimes causes me to overlook what I have (which is not a good thing.)