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Thread started 09/24/16 10:59am

malbena

Have you found acceptance or closure yet?

As the purpose of my thread is to share ways to cope with grief, I have changed the original title from "closure"to "acceptance or closure" so as not to hurt feelings and including everyone's perspectives smile

Grieving is so difficult for many people and is expressed in many different ways. I thought I would start this thread with the intent to help one another with finding closure. In no way, this means forgetting Prince but accepting he is resting in peace in a different place and moving forward in the path of happiness.

Much love! heart heart heart and may you find peace!

[Edited 9/24/16 18:16pm]

This is my normal life. These marital standards cannot be recreated with money.
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Reply #1 posted 09/24/16 11:10am

benni

"Have you found closure yet?"

No.

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Reply #2 posted 09/24/16 12:07pm

SBartist

avatar

No shake

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Reply #3 posted 09/24/16 12:12pm

TheDigitalGard
ener

never mind

[Edited 9/24/16 12:17pm]

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Reply #4 posted 09/24/16 12:32pm

luv4u

Moderator

avatar

moderator

No sad

canada

Ohh purple joy oh purple bliss oh purple rapture!
REAL MUSIC by REAL MUSICIANS - Prince
"I kind of wish there was a reason for Prince to make the site crash more" ~~ Ben
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Reply #5 posted 09/24/16 12:43pm

Amethyst5

No. sad

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Reply #6 posted 09/24/16 1:10pm

zenarose

NO sad

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Reply #7 posted 09/24/16 1:11pm

wishuhvn

With his extremely sudden passing and how ingrained he was with who I am, I don't believe that I will ever fully have closure. So much of who I am was reflected in his music and "that voice." Closure seems out of reach sad

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Reply #8 posted 09/24/16 1:13pm

antonb

A big fat NO.

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Reply #9 posted 09/24/16 1:20pm

Genesia

avatar

I hate that word.

I have accepted Prince's death. I'm still sad about it and wish I knew how it could have happened. But I realize that a definitive answer may never be forthcoming - and don't feel that I am owed one.

We don’t mourn artists because we knew them. We mourn them because they helped us know ourselves.
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Reply #10 posted 09/24/16 1:27pm

1Sasha

No. Never. It is as if he disappeared and his body was never found. You are left with a hole in your heart and in your soul.
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Reply #11 posted 09/24/16 1:41pm

LBrent

No
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Reply #12 posted 09/24/16 1:44pm

justsayno

Yes. That is life, forever changing. As one matures, you realize you don't get "closure" esp. on someone/something you never knew in your real life (most people ofteb don't get "closure" with troubling relationships they actually have, more of an acceptance & hopefully healthy realistic perspective). He is gone & we never knew him. I doubt even those who were physically closest to him knew him. Life goes on. Goodbye sweet P!

[Edited 9/24/16 13:45pm]

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Reply #13 posted 09/24/16 1:57pm

purplethunder3
121

avatar

There's no such thing as "closure." That's a fabricated "pop" psychology term that has no meaning in real life. In real life, one just continues on as best as one can.

"Music gives a soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination and life to everything." --Plato

https://youtu.be/CVwv9LZMah0
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Reply #14 posted 09/24/16 2:04pm

Welcome2daRevo
lution

avatar

No
CALL ME A DREAMER 2!
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Reply #15 posted 09/24/16 2:22pm

GimmeThat

No. I never will, but life goes on. It will always make me sad. broken
2 sevens together
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Reply #16 posted 09/24/16 2:32pm

remko

avatar

No
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Reply #17 posted 09/24/16 2:52pm

OzlemUcucu

avatar

No.

And it feels so much more hurtful the more times passes. At times I am unbelievably unable to listen to his songs without feeling hurt.

I feel like a teenager whose only hero has died for good. When I was teenager he was my hero. Yesterday I saw on my way home a beautiful huge ret sunset. I stood there, closed my eyes and for a moment it felt like it was Prince shining from out the universe.

I guess I just needed the positive energy coming from his way like he used used to. He was a bit like the sun at times.

[img][img:$uid]http://i10.phot.../img:$uid][/img]

[Edited 9/24/16 15:06pm]

Prince I will always miss and love U.
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Reply #18 posted 09/24/16 3:02pm

gollygirl

avatar

Nope - I dont think you ever really get closure on things anyway - it is always nagging there in the back of your mind. Some days are harder than others, but yes, life goes on and we have to go on even if there is sadness there - yesterday I cried quite a lot but others days I'm not crying only sad. I feel I need to get a grip as I did not personally know him, but I still feel sad and sorry the way it ended and the events afterwards.

Thank you Prince for every note you left behind 💜
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Reply #19 posted 09/24/16 3:09pm

malbena

purplethunder3121 said:

There's no such thing as "closure." That's a fabricated "pop" psychology term that has no meaning in real life. In real life, one just continues on as best as one can.



I disagree respectfully smile. We either have a different definition of closure or have lived grief differently. smile
This is my normal life. These marital standards cannot be recreated with money.
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Reply #20 posted 09/24/16 3:15pm

OzlemUcucu

avatar

gollygirl said:

Nope - I dont think you ever really get closure on things anyway - it is always nagging there in the back of your mind. Some days are harder than others, but yes, life goes on and we have to go on even if there is sadness there - yesterday I cried quite a lot but others days I'm not crying only sad. I feel I need to get a grip as I did not personally know him, but I still feel sad and sorry the way it ended and the events afterwards.

sad hug

We all need a group hug sometimes.

It feels damn real too at times when I keep looking everywhere to see some sign of life from him but all I find are so many sad things. I am totally confused of where and what to look at these days. My 20+ years died with him. Chapter closed for good.

Prince I will always miss and love U.
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Reply #21 posted 09/24/16 3:17pm

26ten

Nope. I went to Paisley Park the weekend after he passed and it helped. Every car that drove by was blaring Prince - there was purple everywhere. The 1st Ave dance party line went around the block with fans. Every marquee read "PURPLE RAIN" or "PRINE - WE LOVE YOU!"

.

It helped.

.

I went to see The Revolution and had a crazy ass night in MPLS again - drove all night to get home in ND and had just a legendary time.

.

It helped too.

.

I talked to a woman outside 1st Ave and we were both just being devastated together.

.

Still - I am here all the time and waiting for a new single or album or thinking I can still go to a show and it keeps dawning on me that it won't be happening.

.

The only thing that really helps anymore is songwriting and being here imo. It's so crazy to me still. My family thinks I have a problem most likely - although my GF is quite supportive of me binging etc haha which helps.

.

Anyway - closure hasn't been found yet and I've gotten a lot more chances then most, so I think this is it for the long haul.

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Reply #22 posted 09/24/16 3:19pm

malbena

OzlemUcucu said:



gollygirl said:


Nope - I dont think you ever really get closure on things anyway - it is always nagging there in the back of your mind. Some days are harder than others, but yes, life goes on and we have to go on even if there is sadness there - yesterday I cried quite a lot but others days I'm not crying only sad. I feel I need to get a grip as I did not personally know him, but I still feel sad and sorry the way it ended and the events afterwards.



sad hug



We all need a group hug sometimes.



It feels damn real too at times when I keep looking everywhere to see some sign of life from him but all I find are so many sad things. I am totally confused of where and what to look at these days. My 20+ years died with him. Chapter closed for good.






:hug:
Part of my starting this thread was to find ways to help one another move on.
This is my normal life. These marital standards cannot be recreated with money.
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Reply #23 posted 09/24/16 3:26pm

OzlemUcucu

avatar

malbena said:

OzlemUcucu said:

sad hug

We all need a group hug sometimes.

It feels damn real too at times when I keep looking everywhere to see some sign of life from him but all I find are so many sad things. I am totally confused of where and what to look at these days. My 20+ years died with him. Chapter closed for good.

hug Part of my starting this thread was to find ways to help one another move on.

There should be a proper sticky for this. Often times I can't even express my sadness and grief on the org and I wonder if I am the only one missing Prince. We should be able to express our feelings on this more freely here, but maybe some people have issues with this. Not sure.

Prince I will always miss and love U.
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Reply #24 posted 09/24/16 3:33pm

TrivialPursuit

avatar

Closure is a construct, it's not real when dealing with death. You can't just close the love you have for someone because they're gone.

What is real is acceptance. Doesn't mean one has to love it, or like it. We often accept things we don't like, whether it's phone bills, shitty relatives, the Darth Vader voice on The Rainbow Children, or whatever.

We have to understand these are the cards on the table; this is the hand we've been dealt in the world of Prince. We have to play it. We can't fold out of this one. We can not buy a CD, but we do have to accept this. To deny this is real is to maneuver through an illusion. I get a bit weary of the "can't talk, tears again, unreal" melodrama.

Once we understand (stand under) the truth, then the journey to peace and appreciation can begin. Prince's own journey was his search for the truth, whatever it was. I think it's why he never said what "the truth" was because for each person it's different.

If we loved him, his music, and his life, then we should follow suit. Live in truth, appreciate what he did and the legacy we're all a part of, because in that he'll never be totally gone.

"eye don’t really care so much what people say about me because it is a reflection of who they r."
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Reply #25 posted 09/24/16 3:33pm

lleall

No.

I have friends who say he is just another rockstar who OD.

Can't reconcile this with the public persona Prince projected

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Reply #26 posted 09/24/16 3:33pm

least87

I think I understand closure better in other types of grieving situations. I'm not exactly sure what it means with Prince. Am hopeful that time passing will help - it is supposed to heal all wounds, isn't it? Once there isn't so much news about the estate, tribute concerts, opening of Paisley Park, etc., perhaps that will, too. Now it is sometimes tough to imagine that he is truly gone from this world.

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Reply #27 posted 09/24/16 3:41pm

Genesia

avatar

TrivialPursuit said:

Closure is a construct, it's not real when dealing with death. You can't just close the love you have for someone because they're gone.

What is real is acceptance. Doesn't mean one has to love it, or like it. We often accept things we don't like, whether it's phone bills, shitty relatives, the Darth Vader voice on The Rainbow Children, or whatever.

We have to understand these are the cards on the table; this is the hand we've been dealt in the world of Prince. We have to play it. We can't fold out of this one. We can not buy a CD, but we do have to accept this. To deny this is real is to maneuver through an illusion. I get a bit weary of the "can't talk, tears again, unreal" melodrama.

Once we understand (stand under) the truth, then the journey to peace and appreciation can begin. Prince's own journey was his search for the truth, whatever it was. I think it's why he never said what "the truth" was because for each person it's different.

If we loved him, his music, and his life, then we should follow suit. Live in truth, appreciate what he did and the legacy we're all a part of, because in that he'll never be totally gone.



Well said. Thank you.
We don’t mourn artists because we knew them. We mourn them because they helped us know ourselves.
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Reply #28 posted 09/24/16 3:43pm

OzlemUcucu

avatar

TrivialPursuit said:

Closure is a construct, it's not real when dealing with death. You can't just close the love you have for someone because they're gone.

What is real is acceptance. Doesn't mean one has to love it, or like it. We often accept things we don't like, whether it's phone bills, shitty relatives, the Darth Vader voice on The Rainbow Children, or whatever.

We have to understand these are the cards on the table; this is the hand we've been dealt in the world of Prince. We have to play it. We can't fold out of this one. We can not buy a CD, but we do have to accept this. To deny this is real is to maneuver through an illusion. I get a bit weary of the "can't talk, tears again, unreal" melodrama.

Once we understand (stand under) the truth, then the journey to peace and appreciation can begin. Prince's own journey was his search for the truth, whatever it was. I think it's why he never said what "the truth" was because for each person it's different.

If we loved him, his music, and his life, then we should follow suit. Live in truth, appreciate what he did and the legacy we're all a part of, because in that he'll never be totally gone.

It is not always easy like that. I got into Prince when I was 12 years old. I will be 41 in a month. Do the math. I have never been a fan of any other star. Prince was there through so many stages of my life. It's impossible to close that chapter that easily. It will stay with me forever and the grief shall continue. I will accept missing Prince but I hope I will not get hurt when I look back like in 5 years maybe? Not sure how long that'll take. There is no real pressure. And all the people coming from nowhere all of a sudden don't bother me.

Prince I will always miss and love U.
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Reply #29 posted 09/24/16 3:47pm

luv4u

Moderator

avatar

moderator

TrivialPursuit said:

Closure is a construct, it's not real when dealing with death. You can't just close the love you have for someone because they're gone.

What is real is acceptance. Doesn't mean one has to love it, or like it. We often accept things we don't like, whether it's phone bills, shitty relatives, the Darth Vader voice on The Rainbow Children, or whatever.

We have to understand these are the cards on the table; this is the hand we've been dealt in the world of Prince. We have to play it. We can't fold out of this one. We can not buy a CD, but we do have to accept this. To deny this is real is to maneuver through an illusion. I get a bit weary of the "can't talk, tears again, unreal" melodrama.

Once we understand (stand under) the truth, then the journey to peace and appreciation can begin. Prince's own journey was his search for the truth, whatever it was. I think it's why he never said what "the truth" was because for each person it's different.

If we loved him, his music, and his life, then we should follow suit. Live in truth, appreciate what he did and the legacy we're all a part of, because in that he'll never be totally gone.


Well said clapping

canada

Ohh purple joy oh purple bliss oh purple rapture!
REAL MUSIC by REAL MUSICIANS - Prince
"I kind of wish there was a reason for Prince to make the site crash more" ~~ Ben
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