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Thread started 05/21/16 6:31pm

cardinal

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question for the group: how will we deal with our anger if he had a hand in his own death?

i am not talking suicide, but rather, if this dependency/addiction stuff turns out to be true, and if he turned down treatments/offers for friends to stay over, etc. and this ended up happening partly or largely because of his own choices or stubborness, i fear that it will complicate what is already a complicated grief process. it is common enough to be angry at the one who died, but if they played a part in it, even if they did not want to die, it will be even more likely that some of us will be pissed at prince for that. while i understand on a cognitive level it is a normal part of grieving, i don't know if on top of everything else i can handle being angry at him, too. because i feel tremendous sympathy and pity for his suffering, whatever it was, and the way and place he died haunts me.

i know we don't have official results yet, but we can all see what direction this is going in. how do y'all feel about this?
[Edited 5/21/16 18:31pm]
"If u love somebody, your life won't be in vain
And there's always a rainbow, at the end of every rain."--peace and love, dear prince.....
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Reply #1 posted 05/21/16 6:40pm

daingermouz202
0

It would not effect me.I'd still listen to his music.
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Reply #2 posted 05/21/16 6:47pm

266lydia

It is not anger any of his loyal fans should feel. If he was dependent on pain killers because the hip pain was so horrible, which i have read many articles in the past few years regarding his hip pain. We have to feel compassion for him. He was not taking pain killers to get high. He was taking them to help with the severe pain he was in. After a while your body gets immune to the dose, which then you take higher and higher doses in order to aleviate the pain. Meanwhile the pajn killers are ruining your organs and your heart. The body can only take so much. So, please do not feel anger, please feel love for him. It is a very sad and heartbreaking end to the "PRINCE"we all loved. I wish him love, I wish him Heaven.

RIP sweet Prince...
[Edited 5/21/16 18:50pm]
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Reply #3 posted 05/21/16 6:49pm

266lydia

It is not anger any of his loyal fans should feel. If he was dependent on pain killers because the hip pain was so horrible, which i have read many articles in the past few years regarding his hip pain. We have to feel compassion for him. He was not taking pain killers to get high. He was taking them to help with the severe pain he was in. After a while your body gets immune to the dose, which then you take higher and higher doses in order to aleviate the pain. Meanwhile the pajn killers are ruining your organs and your heart. The body can only take so much. So, please do not feel anger, please feel love for him. It is a very sad and heartbreaking end to the "PRINCE"we all loved. I wish him love, I wish him Heaven.

RIP sweet Prince...
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Reply #4 posted 05/21/16 6:57pm

Harlequin

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I agree with 266lydia, I'm not look at it as an addiction, and I am still shocked at the news. True fans will still love him no matter what happened. That is what being a true fan is. The question is relevant cadinal, and it should be discussed, however, the fact still remains, we have lost someone that has had a massive impact on may lives. Whether it be just musical or on a spiritual level, we are all at a loss. All I can say is from what I have heard, he died alone, and to me that is the hardedst part. He will be eternally missed.

Thank you for showing us the Dawn. RIP Prince!



When all in life gets u down, dont look 2 your friends for help, look to the one that u know will help you.....Jim Beam.
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Reply #5 posted 05/21/16 7:08pm

TrivialPursuit

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It's not our business, really. People do what they have to do in order ot survive, whether it's good for them or not. Chronic pain can lead to all sorts of complications beyond the pain itself.

.

However, all that aside - I have already accepted that it will probably be the truth. I just don't see anyone, suffering as much as Prince probably was, to go untreated in any regard. It's not Prince's fault that (if) he was addicted to them. Some medications are addictive by nature. Percocet, OxyContin, etc. It's an almost instant addiction. Others become that with a longer term use. It doesn't mean users have a hand in their own death. It means a doctor (or doctorS) should have been in better touch to keep an eye on those things. But doctors will always turn a blind eye to the health, in favor of the wealth. Conrad Murray didn't give a shit about MJ - but he sure cared about being on payroll, and hanging around the biggest pop star in the world on a regular basis.

.

It doesn't mean Prince was a druggy. I think people get lost in the sterotype of an addict as some sweaty, wifebeater-wearing slag. It's not the case at all. The worst addictions happen to the best of people. Prince, and MJ are no exception.

.

And don't think Prine never drank. The 1996.Apr.21 incident had alcohol involved. He even talked about depression and drinking (namely Port) in "The Holy River". He might not have on a regular basis, but he did drink on more than one occasion.

"eye don’t really care so much what people say about me because it is a reflection of who they r."
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Reply #6 posted 05/21/16 7:33pm

FUNKNROLL

TrivialPursuit said:

It's not our business, really. People do what they have to do in order ot survive, whether it's good for them or not. Chronic pain can lead to all sorts of complications beyond the pain itself.


.


However, all that aside - I have already accepted that it will probably be the truth. I just don't see anyone, suffering as much as Prince probably was, to go untreated in any regard. It's not Prince's fault that (if) he was addicted to them. Some medications are addictive by nature. Percocet, OxyContin, etc. It's an almost instant addiction. Others become that with a longer term use. It doesn't mean users have a hand in their own death. It means a doctor (or doctorS) should have been in better touch to keep an eye on those things. But doctors will always turn a blind eye to the health, in favor of the wealth. Conrad Murray didn't give a shit about MJ - but he sure cared about being on payroll, and hanging around the biggest pop star in the world on a regular basis.


.


It doesn't mean Prince was a druggy. I think people get lost in the sterotype of an addict as some sweaty, wifebeater-wearing slag. It's not the case at all. The worst addictions happen to the best of people. Prince, and MJ are no exception.


.


And don't think Prine never drank. The 1996.Apr.21 incident had alcohol involved. He even talked about depression and drinking (namely Port) in "The Holy River". He might not have on a regular basis, but he did drink on more than one occasion.



Good points. Unfortunately, he set high expectations for his conduct. I'm can imagine many of us feel like we're watching a tightrope act, waiting for the autopsy. I just hope he wasn't in pain or despair.
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Reply #7 posted 05/21/16 7:36pm

cardinal

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great insightful comments. i know i will always feel sympathy for what he may have gone through. and as to the anger, if this turns out to be true, i will probably feel more anger towards any drs that may hsve been providing meds with little to no monitoring. i can already feel a shift happening. and if after all this, there was wrongdoing, there better be some charges.

it won't bring a beautiful soul back, though, and underneath it all will always be sorrow.
"If u love somebody, your life won't be in vain
And there's always a rainbow, at the end of every rain."--peace and love, dear prince.....
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Reply #8 posted 05/21/16 7:55pm

mailaccount63

hopefully, with compassion....
RIP Prince. We will NEVER forget you. Thank you so much.

"Dearly Beloved:
We are gathered here today 2 get through this thing called: 'Life'."
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Reply #9 posted 05/21/16 8:01pm

endiadj

FUNKNROLL said:

TrivialPursuit said:

It's not our business, really. People do what they have to do in order ot survive, whether it's good for them or not. Chronic pain can lead to all sorts of complications beyond the pain itself.


.


However, all that aside - I have already accepted that it will probably be the truth. I just don't see anyone, suffering as much as Prince probably was, to go untreated in any regard. It's not Prince's fault that (if) he was addicted to them. Some medications are addictive by nature. Percocet, OxyContin, etc. It's an almost instant addiction. Others become that with a longer term use. It doesn't mean users have a hand in their own death. It means a doctor (or doctorS) should have been in better touch to keep an eye on those things. But doctors will always turn a blind eye to the health, in favor of the wealth. Conrad Murray didn't give a shit about MJ - but he sure cared about being on payroll, and hanging around the biggest pop star in the world on a regular basis.


.


It doesn't mean Prince was a druggy. I think people get lost in the sterotype of an addict as some sweaty, wifebeater-wearing slag. It's not the case at all. The worst addictions happen to the best of people. Prince, and MJ are no exception.


.


And don't think Prine never drank. The 1996.Apr.21 incident had alcohol involved. He even talked about depression and drinking (namely Port) in "The Holy River". He might not have on a regular basis, but he did drink on more than one occasion.



Good points. Unfortunately, he set high expectations for his conduct. I'm can imagine many of us feel like we're watching a tightrope act, waiting for the autopsy. I just hope he wasn't in pain or despair.


but, in the end, he was still human prone to make mistakes.
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Reply #10 posted 05/21/16 8:04pm

CROWNS1

I've never met an addict yet that woke up each day and said "gee I'm so happy to be addicted to (insert)". It happens. He was not immune to the human condition and because of his crazy work ethics/schedule, rigorous performances, rehearsals, etc and hip problems, I would be surprised if he wasn't on some type of meds.

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Reply #11 posted 05/21/16 8:13pm

wayhome

Oh my God, this thread topic is so insensitive, stop it.Just stop.

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Reply #12 posted 05/21/16 8:59pm

tmo1965

Prince will forever be my favorite entertainer no matter what the autopsy results show. There will forever be a special place in my heart for him as there is for Michael Jackson.

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Reply #13 posted 05/21/16 9:07pm

alphastreet

I don't think I would be angry, just saddened. I understand these things can impair judgement, or if you have old school or religion based thinking, looking outside of the substance use context, it's more common than not sometimes to deny or refuse treatment, or as someone said earlier in princes case, trying to shield his health issues from the public
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Reply #14 posted 05/21/16 9:31pm

1contessa

CROWNS1 said:

I've never met an addict yet that woke up each day and said "gee I'm so happy to be addicted to (insert)". It happens. He was not immune to the human condition and because of his crazy work ethics/schedule, rigorous performances, rehearsals, etc and hip problems, I would be surprised if he wasn't on some type of meds.

And that's why it's questionable that those who were close to him, claim that they didn't know anything or ever saw him use anything......someone had to know something! How can they not know, when someone was on the plane with him, when he was unresponsive and they had to make an emergency landing, and he was taken to the hospital, you're telling me that the person on the plane with him didn't know anything? Who was driving the black SUV when they showed the photo of him where they said he was agitated, pacing outside of the Walgreen, waiting for his prescriptions, you mean the person that was driving him didn't know anything? There are just many unanswered questions surrounding Prince's death, and I don't care how private he was, he couldn't be that secretive where no around him knew nothing at all, someone had to know something.

[Edited 5/21/16 21:33pm]

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Reply #15 posted 05/21/16 9:31pm

violectrica

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The situation you describe would be like heath ledger.

Who was mad at heath ledger!?

It's tragic. That's a tragedy.

Real actual suicide would be the only thing that pisses me off. Buy even then no wife no kids so it's not even my business to be pissed off since he wasn't mine to lose. I had no natural right to see him in concert again. I'm sure he didn't do that though...due to his religion and even prior ones if he'd securely defected...
No matter the ©️, Paisley Park "official can never ™️ prince. He gave that to us verbally on Oprah in 1996. You can't take prince away from us, corporate. I mean O ( + >
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Reply #16 posted 05/21/16 9:52pm

ilo

wayhome said:

Oh my God, this thread topic is so insensitive, stop it.Just stop.



It may not be good for you but many people are in different places and deal with things differently. What may be incomprehensible for yourself may be therapeutic for others. Would you prevent them that healing process?
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Reply #17 posted 05/21/16 10:11pm

ETHERSPIN

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I've lost a few people over the years but just a portion of them were exceptionally admirable to me and I have a principle I like to employ when those of that ilk pass. the first was my grandfather, a stoic,commanding but ultimately gentle person - I tried to add his essence to my actions going forward, be more quietely strong and courageous, have manners and choose my words carefully and that was around 15 years ago and has worked for me. there have been others since and I have done the same.

I admired Prince, his faith and most of its principles are admirable to me (the general christianity over his life span, not specifically the JW bit which I know little about due to carefully monitoring who I let through the front door!) so I would endeavour to understand whatever happened to Prince and he did preach forgiveness so I'd try to do that if someone external did something reckless or enabling

I don't see eye to eye with Prince about his music promotion.. perhaps I do actually but in this short term situation I think the public needs easy access to exceptional prince performances or shall I say, average Prince performances, so that millions who dismissed him out of a misconception of him would be struck by his talent in this time of enhanced fame by sad circumstance.
heart

** do something,before we're gone , and we're just a rock where a world went wrong...**
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Reply #18 posted 05/21/16 10:15pm

TrivialPursuit

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endiadj said:

FUNKNROLL said:
Good points. Unfortunately, he set high expectations for his conduct. I'm can imagine many of us feel like we're watching a tightrope act, waiting for the autopsy. I just hope he wasn't in pain or despair.
but, in the end, he was still human prone to make mistakes.

And I've said that over and over here, and in other places. While Prince was golden, he wasn't without fault or blemish. The one plus of the internet is that our idols suddenly became very mortal, and very human. We could talk to them, interact with them, and meet them easier sometimes.

.

It's like he told Mel B., "Well regardless of the watch you wear, or your black limo, [...] you ain't so scary." He also said, "Do you find that people live through you, and when you don't act like they expect you to, then you're the bad one?" To me, those fit all this curtain pullin' and mirror polishin'. Prince always wanted people to know the truth - so let's wait and hear it. I can handle it. We all can. We're not that naive, not in 2016. If he was addicted to drugs, it doesn't change anything that we love about him, because the main thing we'll always love about Prince - celebrations, chats, clothes, women, interviews aside - is the music.

"eye don’t really care so much what people say about me because it is a reflection of who they r."
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Reply #19 posted 05/21/16 10:20pm

PeteSilas

i won't be angry, just confused and sad. I don't understand why, with all the guys who've tried to beat drugs, why do people keep doing it. I was also sitting here a minute ago and thinking how nice it would be if fans were able to form an intervention. We'd have at least had a shot at saving some of these guys. I never saw Prince ending up like this, never, I don't think he did either that might have been part of his problem.

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Reply #20 posted 05/21/16 10:24pm

PeteSilas

violectrica said:

The situation you describe would be like heath ledger. Who was mad at heath ledger!? It's tragic. That's a tragedy. Real actual suicide would be the only thing that pisses me off. Buy even then no wife no kids so it's not even my business to be pissed off since he wasn't mine to lose. I had no natural right to see him in concert again. I'm sure he didn't do that though...due to his religion and even prior ones if he'd securely defected...

I remember Greil Marcus mentioning how Dave Marsh looked on the day Elvis died, shellshocked, and how Marsh said something like 'he was suppossed to be here as a national treasure, someone I could share with my grandkids". that's honestly what i expected for Prince, someone who'd go after a life well into old age, I feel a little cheated because can't nobody do it like him and inspite of the miserable souls on this site who never had a good word about him, I firmly believe he would have just climbing new mountains and surprising us till he was 90. His dad lived to 85 so he had the genes for longevity I think.

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Reply #21 posted 05/21/16 10:31pm

HeavenMustBNea
r

This is why I stopped coming on here for a few days. This place is getting cluttered with depressing and nonsensical threads like this. I'm really not trying to be mean but...
What do you mean? Mad at him for what? For being human??? For making a mistake but actually preparing to get help like most people aren't strong enought to do? Please cut it out. I know you are grieving as many of us are. But some are grieving to the point where it truly hurts. We do not have the facts so there is no use for another "What if" thread. Let's just continue to love him. I know I do... Deeply. Because the realizatiion is, we have NO control of what happens to the people we love in this life. It's in God's hands. I'm not saying you can't express your feelings. I'm just saying, keep this all in perspective. Again, I'm not trying to be mean. That is not my intention at all. But please stop with this. I'm not trying to start an argument so please don't take it as such. He was human. Jeez. We don't have the facts. Even when we do, what has happened has already happened. Anger has no place in it. What better way to honor him by forgiving and loving him and others? There are so many lessons in this tragedy. That being said, can this thread dissapear now? Pretty please!?
<3
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Reply #22 posted 05/21/16 10:41pm

PeteSilas

hopefully some of these speculations will be put to rest when we get some answers. some on here have said they really don't care how he died but it is important to know. Bruce Lee died under strange circumstances and it has only led to outlandish speculations even 40 some odd years later. The down side to that is it's hurtful to people who knew and loved him, so it's best to just have some answers. It won't quiet everyone, there will always be the people who call people names and others who believe in kooky conspiracies but those are outliers i think. Most of the people who cared about Prince are fairly rational.

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Reply #23 posted 05/21/16 11:49pm

nursev

It was his choice and his life. We have to understand and accept that.

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Reply #24 posted 05/22/16 12:49am

MissMarySharon

I think this is a fair question, Cardinal. Everyone grieves/copes differently. For me, as the days pass it's actually becoming less important to me how he died. Knowing the details won't bring him back. In many ways he was such a proud and dignified person, someone who hated intrusion, he would have loathed all the speculation/gossip surrounding his death (just generally in the media I mean, not attacking the org or fans). Re his career, I liked that he was mysterious, he knew exactly how to create magic around himself by never giving the world too much. Maybe he had a lot of secrets, who knows, but perhaps they were his to know and should be kept. As a fan, myself I don't need to know everthing - his personal life choices were his to make and nothing to do with me. However he died, it won't alter my love and respect for him. If I have any anger, it is directed towards the media hoopla etc., which is reflective of the vile age we live in, where people are held up to impossible standards and then kicked to ribbons by those who just want to sell trash and gossip and make money out of it.

May he rest in peace.

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Reply #25 posted 05/22/16 1:02am

PeteSilas

i'm sitting here watching his 2005 naacp performance and just in awe at his performance, that era he was still improving as a musician, the guitar playing near the end of that should make anyone who ever said anything negative about his historical standing on that instrument shuttup. Anyway, the sense of loss just does not go away for me, it's a huge loss, huge. I don't think it should affect anything, sometimes it's just such a little thing that brings about a persons demise. And, for whatever reason, maybe god is trying to teach a person a lesson, who knows but sometimes these kinds of deaths are just ironic. Sam Cooke, a guy who did everything he could to live a well thought out life and particularly his lovelife, here was a guy who shunned groupies because he feared the attachment, he would go with prostitutes just to avoid trouble, turns out one of them steals his clothes and he uncharacteristically loses his temper and gets shot. Bruce Lee's doctors say he died from allergic reaction to cannibis, what a bizarre way to die and he ate the stuff in an attempt to relax, not to die. you never know in life, ironic things happen.That is to say, out of all the guys i wouldn't think would have an end like this, it was Prince. But then, Jerry Lee Lewis lived crazier than most of his contemporaries and he's still kicking.

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Reply #26 posted 05/22/16 1:03am

weirdozmedia

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It's really none of my business how he died, and has no relation to how much I love his music. I think appreciation of art should always be separate from the artist anyway.

¡The Future Is Ours, If You Can Count! https://www.youtube.com/w...A_zTY0qWWk
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Reply #27 posted 05/22/16 1:08am

McD

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Again guys, this ship has already sailed.

.

What we know FOR SURE, is that Prince had some kind of medical emergency on a plane. Reports indicate he was in 'a very bad way', and that he was strongly urged not to leave the hospital. Now, you can choose not to believe that at this stage, but frankly, you'd be nuts.

.

He left the hospital anyway.

.

Then announced a party and went biking around MPLS.

.

Prince made fatal misjudgements concerning his health during the last week of his life. At the very least. Unless, of course, we find out he had a fatal disease and he felt that his actions were irrelevant to the outcome. But even in that case, he didn't have to die on Apr 21st.

.

The basic facts we know about the emergency plane landing, and Prince's behaviour in the 48 hours after he recovered consciousness, close the book on this issue whatever you think happened in the four days after that.

.

Loads of people make fatal misjudegements regarding their health. Loads more make the same mistakes but get clean away with it. The possibility that you might, is a factor behind most of it, I would think.

.

And we know that Prince wasn't wired like ordinary folk.

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Reply #28 posted 05/22/16 1:11am

morningsong

Sure I could be angry with him. It's difficult not knowing what to be angry about , which for me is delaying the healing process not to feel whatever I need to fully feel . If this was avoidable by simply taking some time off to handle whatever the problem was, I going to be upset.
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Reply #29 posted 05/22/16 1:13am

PeteSilas

McD said:

Again guys, this ship has already sailed.

.

What we know FOR SURE, is that Prince had some kind of medical emergency on a plane. Reports indicate he was in 'a very bad way', and that he was strongly urged not to leave the hospital. Now, you can choose not to believe that at this stage, but frankly, you'd be nuts.

.

He left the hospital anyway.

.

Then announced a party and went biking around MPLS.

.

Prince made fatal misjudgements concerning his health during the last week of his life. At the very least. Unless, of course, we find out he had a fatal disease and he felt that his actions were irrelevant to the outcome. But even in that case, he didn't have to die on Apr 21st.

.

The basic facts we know about the emergency plane landing, and Prince's behaviour in the 48 hours after he recovered consciousness, close the book on this issue whatever you think happened in the four days after that.

.

Loads of people make fatal misjudegements regarding their health. Loads more make the same mistakes but get clean away with it. The possibility that you might, is a factor behind most of it, I would think.

.

And we know that Prince wasn't wired like ordinary folk.

that was my general point. Bruce Lee had an allergic reaction to the cannibis about 6 weeks before the fatal episode, it didn't stop him even though he was told to stop. What do we make of that? i don't know. Couple weeks ago i got food poisoning, i was miserable, i thought about Prince and wondered if he was in this kind of agony and thought about how tempting it would be to take a pill to stop that kind of illness. It's not something I'm prepared to judge.

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Forums > Prince: Music and More > question for the group: how will we deal with our anger if he had a hand in his own death?