I mentioned on another thread how things might be at future concerts and I’ve had more scary visions…..

The year is now 2040….

We are all old and wrinkly. The org fams get their tickets for the new show, the first in 10 years, via the club of course.

We are all saddened by the news of the death of one fam, who, while innocently picking up a bank statement from the door mat, died as the 300 CDs finally dropped through his letterbox on his head, after 38 years of waiting. His last words were “cool, Roadhouse Garden………..uhhh”.

The day of the concert, we all make our way to the venue, driven by various children and grand children, or in many cases, the Sunshine bus.

We arrive, and to our despair, we find our Dutch friends, already at the front, who have been camped out for the last 17 years.

They begin to dispatch the raffle tickets to keep the queue orderly. Things start to go wrong when one fam shouts “bingo” when he find read his ticket, “all the sixes, 66” and proceeds to dance around until the heart attack sets in.

Somewhere off, about 100 feet from the queue, a French group make a break for the front. Despite taking half an hour to walk the distance with the aid of their sticks and walkers, they make the front, and hold open a space for there 50 friends.

Finally the doors open and we creep into the arena and one mile per hour.

Despite the need to remain in the crowd, one fam breaks off to the Merchandise stand to get his t-shirt. He looks too fine with the phrase “Chelsea talk to Russia before its 2 late!” across his chest.

Of course, all the ladies have a purple rinse in the hair to celebrate.

The inner door opens and we all rush in. Gav gets pushed to the side, breaking his leg on the fall, spilling a hundred copies of Uptown 376 in to the aisle. No one can pick them up, as they cannot bend down that low.

Surprisingly enough, familiar, but older faces take the front row.

The sound check is more important than ever. Prince hobbles on the stage. The heels have taken their effect over the years, and he can hardly walk. He sits in his new chair at the front of the stage, zips his cardigan up to keep him warm and begins his set.

After 10 minutes, he realises the music has started, and begins to give “on the one” commands to the band, via his eye recognition software, attached to the back facing monitor.

It’s not long before Prince falls asleep, and remains in his chair between the end of the sound check and the beginning of the show.

He is awoken by the band, and instantly shows his professionalism, by shouting “Snare drum pound on the two and four! Those with teeth scream for more! Bass!

The show has begun!

All is going well until “Horny Pony”. With the memory failure getting the better of him Prince decides to do the little red corvette splits. After the 30-minute break for the doctors, he returns for a fantastic rendition of “In this bed I pee”.

There is another scare, in the encore, where Prince leaves is stool again to sing “The Beautiful Ones”. At the point of screaming, he lay on the floor and stopped. It was at least a couple of minutes before anyone realised he was asleep.

Before I knew it, the show was over. I feebly turned to a fam and said, “that so was so good, I could shit myself”. And ….

Woops. Sorry.

man that is funny !!! hehehehe
[This message was edited Wed Oct 9 18:31:47 PDT 2002 by justanotherasshole]

When does the presale starts? I definitly wanna see that show!

SquirrelMeat said:

Hilarious!

Although I'm sure that's what my 14 year old think happens at Prince Concerts now

SquirrelMeat said:

ROFLMAO !!!

hahahah - Ill be there - C U

I posted this ealier reg. the rollingstone.com list

Maybe I should have said 2040 not 2014

Sahar said