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Thread started 03/13/19 10:24pm

KingBAD

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apparently i owe.... who got jokes???

i got a few

i don't know if anybody picked up the mantel of postin jokes

but i do know it was left to me right before things went off,

so because of that i got some catchin up to do...

Two windmills are standin in a field. One asks the other, "What kind of music do you like?"

The other one says, "I’m a big metal fan."

My girlfriend says I’m hopeless at fixin appliances.

Well, she's in for a shock.

A man showed up for a duel armed only with a pencil and paper.

He then proceeded to draw his weapon.

A boy asks his Dad one day, "Dad, why is my sister called Paris?"

His Dad replies, "Because she was conceived in Paris."

The boy says, "Ahh, thanks Dad."

His Dad says, "You're welcome, Backseat."

Thanks for explainin the word "many" to me.

It means a lot.

The mother who injected her 8 year-old child with Botox for beauty pageants has lost custody.

Her daughter look surprised.

What do you call an imaginary color?

A pigment of your imagination.

I was on a flight the other day when the air hostess came up to me and said, "Excuse me sir, would you like to have dinner?"

I said, "What are the options?"

She said, "Yes and No."

My girlfriend isn’t talkin to me because apparently I ruined her birthday.

I’m not sure how I did that – I didn’t even know it was her birthday…

I left my Adderall in my Ford Fiesta.

Now it’s a Ford Focus.

When does a joke become a Dad joke?

When it becomes a full groan.

My friend has got a butler who only has one arm.

Serves him right.

My favorite color is purple.

I like it more than blue and red combined.

i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
evilking
STOP ME IF YOU HEARD THIS BEFORE...
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Reply #1 posted 03/14/19 1:40am

EmmaMcG

I'd like to start with a few chimney jokes. I've got a stack of them. The first one is on the house.

I said to the gym instructor "can you teach me how to do the splits". He said "how flexible are you?". I said "I can't make Tuesdays."

I love trying to pack myself into a small suitcase. I can hardly contain myself.

I saw an ad in the window of a shop that read "television for sale, €1, volume stuck on full". I thought to myself, "I can't turn that down".

I've just been on a once in a lifetime holiday. Never again.

Conjunctivitis.com. It's a site for sore eyes.
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Reply #2 posted 03/14/19 6:30am

XxAxX

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Image result for jokes golf

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Reply #3 posted 03/14/19 6:30am

XxAxX

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shrug redface lol

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Reply #4 posted 03/14/19 6:44am

XxAxX

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Image result for pi day

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Reply #5 posted 03/14/19 7:17am

RodeoSchro

KingBAD said:

i got a few

i don't know if anybody picked up the mantel of postin jokes

but i do know it was left to me right before things went off,

so because of that i got some catchin up to do...

Two windmills are standin in a field. One asks the other, "What kind of music do you like?"

The other one says, "I’m a big metal fan."

My girlfriend says I’m hopeless at fixin appliances.

Well, she's in for a shock.

A man showed up for a duel armed only with a pencil and paper.

He then proceeded to draw his weapon.

A boy asks his Dad one day, "Dad, why is my sister called Paris?"

His Dad replies, "Because she was conceived in Paris."

The boy says, "Ahh, thanks Dad."

His Dad says, "You're welcome, Backseat."

Thanks for explainin the word "many" to me.

It means a lot.

The mother who injected her 8 year-old child with Botox for beauty pageants has lost custody.

Her daughter look surprised.

What do you call an imaginary color?

A pigment of your imagination.

I was on a flight the other day when the air hostess came up to me and said, "Excuse me sir, would you like to have dinner?"

I said, "What are the options?"

She said, "Yes and No."

My girlfriend isn’t talkin to me because apparently I ruined her birthday.

I’m not sure how I did that – I didn’t even know it was her birthday…

I left my Adderall in my Ford Fiesta.

Now it’s a Ford Focus.

When does a joke become a Dad joke?

When it becomes a full groan.

My friend has got a butler who only has one arm.

Serves him right.

My favorite color is purple.

I like it more than blue and red combined.



falloff Welcome to the Org! highfive

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Reply #6 posted 03/14/19 8:54am

2freaky4church
1

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pc times now my man.

All you others say Hell Yea!! woot!
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Reply #7 posted 03/14/19 10:04am

KingBAD

avatar

EmmaMcG said:

I'd like to start with a few chimney jokes. I've got a stack of them. The first one is on the house. I said to the gym instructor "can you teach me how to do the splits". He said "how flexible are you?". I said "I can't make Tuesdays." I love trying to pack myself into a small suitcase. I can hardly contain myself. I saw an ad in the window of a shop that read "television for sale, €1, volume stuck on full". I thought to myself, "I can't turn that down". I've just been on a once in a lifetime holiday. Never again. Conjunctivitis.com. It's a site for sore eyes.

lol lol lol lol lol

lol lol lol lol lol

lol lol lol lol lol

lol lol lol lol lol

i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
evilking
STOP ME IF YOU HEARD THIS BEFORE...
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #8 posted 03/14/19 10:05am

KingBAD

avatar

XxAxX said:

Image result for jokes golf

lol lol lol lol lol

i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
evilking
STOP ME IF YOU HEARD THIS BEFORE...
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #9 posted 03/14/19 10:07am

KingBAD

avatar

XxAxX said:

Image result for pi day

yo...

it never eem crossed my mind...

OPINION WITHOUT PI IS JUST ONION!!!!

i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
evilking
STOP ME IF YOU HEARD THIS BEFORE...
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #10 posted 03/14/19 10:09am

KingBAD

avatar

RodeoSchro said:

KingBAD said:

i got a few

i don't know if anybody picked up the mantel of postin jokes

but i do know it was left to me right before things went off,

so because of that i got some catchin up to do...

Two windmills are standin in a field. One asks the other, "What kind of music do you like?"

The other one says, "I’m a big metal fan."

My girlfriend says I’m hopeless at fixin appliances.

Well, she's in for a shock.

A man showed up for a duel armed only with a pencil and paper.

He then proceeded to draw his weapon.

A boy asks his Dad one day, "Dad, why is my sister called Paris?"

His Dad replies, "Because she was conceived in Paris."

The boy says, "Ahh, thanks Dad."

His Dad says, "You're welcome, Backseat."

Thanks for explainin the word "many" to me.

It means a lot.

The mother who injected her 8 year-old child with Botox for beauty pageants has lost custody.

Her daughter look surprised.

What do you call an imaginary color?

A pigment of your imagination.

I was on a flight the other day when the air hostess came up to me and said, "Excuse me sir, would you like to have dinner?"

I said, "What are the options?"

She said, "Yes and No."

My girlfriend isn’t talkin to me because apparently I ruined her birthday.

I’m not sure how I did that – I didn’t even know it was her birthday…

I left my Adderall in my Ford Fiesta.

Now it’s a Ford Focus.

When does a joke become a Dad joke?

When it becomes a full groan.

My friend has got a butler who only has one arm.

Serves him right.

My favorite color is purple.

I like it more than blue and red combined.



falloff Welcome to the Org! highfive

worship

did you keep up the jokes???

i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
evilking
STOP ME IF YOU HEARD THIS BEFORE...
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #11 posted 03/14/19 10:10am

KingBAD

avatar

2freaky4church1 said:

pc times now my man.

"My motherfucker's so cool sheep count him."

lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol

you really missed me huh????

i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
evilking
STOP ME IF YOU HEARD THIS BEFORE...
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #12 posted 03/14/19 4:11pm

EmmaMcG

Here's some non PC jokes, just for 2freaky4church1.

What do you call a woman who can't cook?
Single.


What do you call a letter from a feminist?
Hate male.


What's the difference between a woman and a brick?
When you lay a brick, it doesn't follow you around for 2 weeks.


What takes up 12 parking spaces?
6 women drivers.


Why do women like to have sex with the lights off?
They can't stand to see a man have a good time.
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Reply #13 posted 03/14/19 4:46pm

S2DG

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I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.

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Reply #14 posted 03/14/19 4:47pm

S2DG

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I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day.

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Reply #15 posted 03/14/19 5:26pm

Hudson

avatar

EmmaMcG said:

Here's some non PC jokes, just for 2freaky4church1.

What do you call a woman who can't cook?
Single.


What do you call a letter from a feminist?
Hate male.


What's the difference between a woman and a brick?
When you lay a brick, it doesn't follow you around for 2 weeks.


What takes up 12 parking spaces?
6 women drivers.


Why do women like to have sex with the lights off?
They can't stand to see a man have a good time.



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Reply #16 posted 03/14/19 7:46pm

KingBAD

avatar

EmmaMcG said:

Here's some non PC jokes, just for 2freaky4church1. What do you call a woman who can't cook? Single. What do you call a letter from a feminist? Hate male. What's the difference between a woman and a brick? When you lay a brick, it doesn't follow you around for 2 weeks. What takes up 12 parking spaces? 6 women drivers. Why do women like to have sex with the lights off? They can't stand to see a man have a good time.

lol lol lol lol lol

lol lol lol lol lol

lol lol lol lol lol

lol lol lol lol lol

lol lol lol lol lol

i'm dyin....

i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
evilking
STOP ME IF YOU HEARD THIS BEFORE...
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #17 posted 03/14/19 7:47pm

KingBAD

avatar

S2DG said:

I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day.

lol lol lol lol lol

lol lol lol lol lol

i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
evilking
STOP ME IF YOU HEARD THIS BEFORE...
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #18 posted 03/15/19 9:00am

XxAxX

avatar

KingBAD said:

XxAxX said:

Image result for pi day

yo...

it never eem crossed my mind...

OPINION WITHOUT PI IS JUST ONION!!!!

eek eek eek eek eek eek eek eek omg you're right!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol

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Reply #19 posted 03/17/19 7:42am

RodeoSchro

KingBAD said:

RodeoSchro said:



falloff Welcome to the Org! highfive

worship

did you keep up the jokes???




Some times, but not as good as you did it! Glad you're back and I hope you're crushing it!

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Forums > General Discussion > apparently i owe.... who got jokes???