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Thread started 11/07/17 6:58am

free2bFreeda2

How Do You Cope With a CoWorker Who Yells at You in Front of Others?

a friend of mine has to deal with s lead who she is an assistant to. the lead very often yells at her in front of patrons and co workers. She tries to let it go each time, but the situation seems to be overwhelming for her.
any suggestions?
Noah Trevor said. "you were an accident👤. there was a hole in the electoral system, & we're just trying to make this work, Donald." rip: Sergeant La David T Johnson 🌼
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Reply #1 posted 11/07/17 7:18am

purplethunder3
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Record the inappropriate behavior and complain to her superiors, yell back. or find another job.

Find strength in that which remains...
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Reply #2 posted 11/07/17 7:21am

XxAxX

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oh man. find another job. if that ain't possible, she should write down every occasion on which this abuse occurs (keep a diary) and report this behavior to her supervisor.

shouting at others is most definitely against most workplace rules ansd regulations as there are better ways to handle conflict resolution.

when speaking to her lead's supervisor, tell her to use the buzz word "creating a hostile working environment" and "abusive behavior causing emotional distress". that should make any employer stand up and take notice

basically her lead is 'assaulting' her in the workplace by making her fear for her own well being and if the lead should happen to actually make physical contact under suich a scenario, the claim potentially rises to assault and battery.

the very best thing she could do for her own health is to leave the building, find another job with good people. which isn't always possible. i'm wishing her the best.

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Reply #3 posted 11/07/17 7:36am

luvsexy4all

point out to everyone else ..this could happen to u at any time

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Reply #4 posted 11/07/17 8:46am

paisleypark4

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Record it on her phone!

Download all the shit hop that you can for your kids, neices, nephews, and their friends also. That will prevent them from going out and buying it and will prevent some shit hop sales. Every little bit helps - Andy
http://www.soundclick.com/bands/pagemus
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Reply #5 posted 11/07/17 9:01am

EmmaMcG

Luckily I've never had it happen to me but in that situation I'm afraid I'd probably end up doing something that would get me fired. At least.

Maybe the best thing to do would be for her to tell her boss not to yell at her. Best way to deal with a bully is head on.
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Reply #6 posted 11/07/17 9:21am

RodeoSchro

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Tell that person what they are doing constitutes workplace harrassment, and that you (the person being yelled at) got that information from an attorney.

If the yeller can't read between the lines (s/he and the company are looking at getting sued), then I would suggest actually following up with an attorney. It would be best if the victim could record some of the yelling, and/or round up some co-workers who would agree to support the victim's claim.

Second Funkiest White Man in America

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Reply #7 posted 11/07/17 9:28am

2045RadicalMat
tZ

paisleypark4 said:

Record it on her phone!

THIS IS GOOD:

HOWEVER...this is something I've always wanted to ask a lawyer about....

... Being that many places of employment require employees to sign non disclosure agreements and MEDIATION contracts.... at some point... (up to termination) is the offense, harsh enough to warrant a breach of said agreement?

would it have to be criminal?.... cause surely in a case like this, there are possible scenarios where an employer can be outright abusive. I've not seen it myself, I've mostly heard about it in the "entertainment industry" actors with PAs etc.

Some corporations have stipulations in small print rendering stating recording devices aren't permitted by employees... but if so... would any civil case/criminal case necessitate the termination of an employee before it can be used?

I started thinking about this when going back to the old neighborhood and seeing the first market I'd worked at had changed names. I went in... and it was mostly (sadly) the same old employees from the previous incorporation. I figure they got sued for abuses of employee rights and cut the original LLC, therby selling it to someone else.

They had routinely faked losses, in order to get "upstart" (more thoughtful/progressive) employees under scrutiny for theft from missed cash drops etc. 2 others and myself were allegedly involved.... despite cash drops being done by managers and being accounted for.

I'd gone down to their offices near Downey to speak with a Loss Prevention "investigator" and seen their phoney suggestive video on the monitor (grey video, could have been taken anywhere, it was a device used to intimidate people working there and CERTAINLY wasn't actual recording from the store)...which was quickly turned off when I entered the room [cheaply suggesting that it had something to do with the "incident"]

of course.. the "money was found" after 3 weeks of unpaid time... for me and 3 others... which lead me to believe it was a phoney practice... I was 19, so what resources did I have to contest this?

anyways... I can see how workers can feel intimidated by corrupt practices...and am wondering about when a recording can be used.

"Damn Dolores, pick another subject, please...introduce the carpet to something other than your knees...."
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Reply #8 posted 11/07/17 10:35am

TrivialPursuit

purplethunder3121 said:

Record the inappropriate behavior and complain to her superiors, yell back. or find another job.


This is solid. Record it. Put a phone in the person's face. It's a non-verbal warning. Or hide the phone in the pocket with the camera pointed outward recording. The next time the district or regional person comes in, play it. The person could lose their job, but to expose it puts the responsibility on the boss's superiors to do something about it.

"Despite everything, no 1 can dictate who u r 2 other people." - Prince |
http://bit.ly/unboxingprince
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Reply #9 posted 11/07/17 1:03pm

babynoz

I don't think that leaving is necessarily a good option, particularly if it's a good job. Those are hard to find and there's NO guarantee that the next job won't have someone worse. Every job has their resident assclown. Don't let some jerk run you off.

Since punching said assclown in the throat probably isn't an option, I'd say go with Rodeo's suggestion. lol

Prince, in you I found a kindred spirit...Rest In Paradise.
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Reply #10 posted 11/07/17 1:52pm

StrangeButTrue

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I work directly with a successful businessperson of somewhat notoriety and he is infamous for freaking out about the most random things. It keeps me on my toes and I often learn more from the people he yells at about how to avoid his wrath. The solution is to keep your shit tight n right, that way no one can question your legitimacy. Screaming and having a tantrum is just theatrics if you know your deck is full of winning cards. I once had a boss that cried alot (literally) about things that weren't work-related I look at it the same way. Its them not you. If you think its you, do something about it to make it right. lol Tie those laces in a double knot so you don't trip over yourself.

if it was just a dream, call me a dreamer 2
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Reply #11 posted 11/07/17 1:59pm

purplepolitici
an

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Used 2 b I'd yell back n got sent home or something lol. Never did get fired from a job tho. Last time it happened I went sick over the walkie talkie n just didn't go back. Haven't had any real problems w/ co-workers @ current gig (customers on the other hand innocent). When I get overwhelmed I get quiet n they start asking me if I'm bugged or whatev. They're cool. Never cool 2 yell @ ppl tho, especially in the workplace. My advice would b 2 snitch of course wink smile.

Who got some money? dancing jig
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Reply #12 posted 11/07/17 4:22pm

KingBAD

free2bFreeda2 said:

a friend of mine has to deal with s lead who she is an assistant to. the lead very often yells at her in front of patrons and co workers. She tries to let it go each time, but the situation seems to be overwhelming for her. any suggestions?

this is how i learned MY work ethics...

fukkk a job!!!

just like po leece that live behind badges

folks tend to think a job title make em

invincible...

you ask nicely not to be addressed like that

then you ask not to be addressed by that person,

then you fukkk em up and take the rest of the day off....

if a case should be brought up on you for doin it

you simply make it known that you have tried to

get away from this threatenin person every way

they system availed to to no good end and the

proximity of that person made you fear for your

personal safty....

real simple shit...

if money is more important than personal dignity

fukkk it. stay there and do the fukkkin job well enough

to be unapproachable....

[Edited 11/7/17 19:34pm]

i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
evilking
"KingBAD, well you are just a troll" (an emotional fan)
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Reply #13 posted 11/07/17 5:35pm

214

Kill the mother fucker. Get rid of the body afterwards.

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Reply #14 posted 11/07/17 6:14pm

morningsong

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babynoz said:

I don't think that leaving is necessarily a good option, particularly if it's a good job. Those are hard to find and there's NO guarantee that the next job won't have someone worse. Every job has their resident assclown. Don't let some jerk run you off.

Since punching said assclown in the throat probably isn't an option, I'd say go with Rodeo's suggestion. lol



lol

I was going to say what an old supervisor of mine use to say. "Kick 'em in the neck"



“Do I dare Disturb the universe?”
― T.S. Eliot

“Only by acceptance of the past, can you alter it”
― T.S. Eliot
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Reply #15 posted 11/07/17 6:20pm

purplethunder3
121

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Related image

Find strength in that which remains...
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Reply #16 posted 11/07/17 9:42pm

free2bFreeda2

All of you are so awesome.
thx so much..
i will read some of your suggestions to her. 👀
º
i suggested to try to side step her leads hostile yelling act-outs by staying silent and to stay focused on whatever she's doing at the time the yelling starts,
stay quiet until the yelling ceases.
then take a bresth, count backwards 7 - to - 1, then turn to the customers and cordially apologize
for her co-worker's yelling and that her actions do not represent the store's policy on employee conduct..
then turn away and continue her customer related task or other assigned duties. finally ignore her (the yeller) without being overtly rude.so
😇
whadda u think?
Noah Trevor said. "you were an accident👤. there was a hole in the electoral system, & we're just trying to make this work, Donald." rip: Sergeant La David T Johnson 🌼
: https://www.google.com/am...orker.com/
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Reply #17 posted 11/08/17 1:11am

heartbeatocean

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free2bFreeda2 said:

All of you are so awesome. thx so much.. i will read some of your suggestions to her. 👀 º i suggested to try to side step her leads hostile yelling act-outs by staying silent and to stay focused on whatever she's doing at the time the yelling starts, stay quiet until the yelling ceases. then take a bresth, count backwards 7 - to - 1, then turn to the customers and cordially apologize for her co-worker's yelling and that her actions do not represent the store's policy on employee conduct.. then turn away and continue her customer related task or other assigned duties. finally ignore her (the yeller) without being overtly rude.so 😇 whadda u think?

Sounds like a nightmare. If she can hold to that and the lead looks like an absolute fool in comparison, then that might work temporarily. However, I would follow it up with a talk afterward saying that she refuses to be treated that way and that it's completely inappropriate to do that, especially in front of others. It is also very poor business demeanor, so bring it to a superior if nothing changes. Emphasize that it turns customers off and makes the company look unprofessional. Appeal to the bottom line. They are losing dollars by employing somebody who behaves that way. Make it sound like she is concerned about the business, not herself. And that it affects her performance as well, because she performs better in a more positive environment.

I saw an airline employee yell at another employee once at the baggage claim, blaming them for lost luggage or whatever the problem was. Airline customers were appalled and said they would make a complaint. It is VERY POOR customer service to expose that kind of behavior in public.

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Reply #18 posted 11/08/17 7:53am

Genesia

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free2bFreeda2 said:

All of you are so awesome. thx so much.. i will read some of your suggestions to her. 👀 º i suggested to try to side step her leads hostile yelling act-outs by staying silent and to stay focused on whatever she's doing at the time the yelling starts, stay quiet until the yelling ceases. then take a bresth, count backwards 7 - to - 1, then turn to the customers and cordially apologize for her co-worker's yelling and that her actions do not represent the store's policy on employee conduct.. then turn away and continue her customer related task or other assigned duties. finally ignore her (the yeller) without being overtly rude.so 😇 whadda u think?


Wait a minute - this happens in front of CUSTOMERS?! eek

How does this person still have a job?

I mean if he did have sex he would break every rule Jehova's have regarding premarital sex so Prince is really just friends with them all anyway.
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Reply #19 posted 11/08/17 8:22am

StrangeButTrue

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purplepolitician said:

sick over the walkie talkie n just didn't go back.

....do tell.

if it was just a dream, call me a dreamer 2
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Reply #20 posted 11/09/17 3:26pm

JoeyC

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Answers have already been given, and i don't really have anything else to add to the solution. I just want to say though, that i feel for your friend. I couldn't function in an environment like that. In a work setting, there's no excuse for someone behaving in that manner.



The first time that it happened, would be the last time that it happened.

Rest in Peace Bettie Boo. See u soon.
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Reply #21 posted 11/09/17 10:37pm

purplethunder3
121

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JoeyC said:

Answers have already been given, and i don't really have anything else to add to the solution. I just want to say though, that i feel for your friend. I couldn't function in an environment like that. In a work setting, there's no excuse for someone behaving in that manner.



The first time that it happened, would be the last time that it happened.

A toxic work environment long-term ain't worth the money.

Find strength in that which remains...
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Reply #22 posted 11/10/17 3:04pm

XxAxX

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purplethunder3121 said:

JoeyC said:

Answers have already been given, and i don't really have anything else to add to the solution. I just want to say though, that i feel for your friend. I couldn't function in an environment like that. In a work setting, there's no excuse for someone behaving in that manner.



The first time that it happened, would be the last time that it happened.

A toxic work environment long-term ain't worth the money.



agree. plus, the issue of shouting is probably already known to management, and has not been addressed because management, well, just doesn't address this. i worked at a place where one of the owners (an attorney) shouted at other attorneys and assistants out in the hallways and reception area where clients and all could hear. poor guy. very likeable, even lovable person. but he seemed so stressed out.

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Reply #23 posted 11/10/17 3:20pm

KingBAD

Image result for hulk loki gif

i am KING BAD!!!
you are NOT...
evilking
"KingBAD, well you are just a troll" (an emotional fan)
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Reply #24 posted 11/10/17 3:25pm

purplethunder3
121

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KingBAD said:

Image result for hulk loki gif

Hulk don't take no shit from anybody! lol

Find strength in that which remains...
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Reply #25 posted 11/11/17 7:02am

alphastreet

I dealt with that years ago, and it was emotional abusive comments too in front of others too. No one did anything though I tried to complain, but I did end up changing my hours and saw her minimally. It's too bad because I knew she was smarter than this but a total asshole. Everyone knew it but eventually she got fired. One can only get away with that type of behaviour for so long, it can take one toxic person to just ruin the dynamics for others.

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Reply #26 posted 11/11/17 9:26am

free2bFreeda2

firstly, thx 2 er'one for ur positive, constructive and (some) humorous suggestions.
however check the following out:
🖥
according to my friend, a (frequent) customer came to her register to check out chosen items for purchase. after the transaction was completed, the customer informed my friend that she had phoned the store's manager and made a complaint about the "yeller."🙄
not sure what will follow via this action.
hopefully things will improve and the yeller will amend her egregiousnegregiousness.
Noah Trevor said. "you were an accident👤. there was a hole in the electoral system, & we're just trying to make this work, Donald." rip: Sergeant La David T Johnson 🌼
: https://www.google.com/am...orker.com/
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Reply #27 posted 11/11/17 11:21am

2freaky4church
1

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Didn't Prince do that all the time? Lisa, put down that cigarette.

"2freaky is a complete stud." DJ
"2freaky is very down." 2Elijah.
"2freaky convinced me to join Antifa: OnlyNDA
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Reply #28 posted 11/11/17 2:22pm

luv4u

Moderator

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Document everything.

Video everything

Edmonton, AB - canada

Ohh purple joy oh purple bliss oh purple rapture!
REAL MUSIC by REAL MUSICIANS - Prince
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Reply #29 posted 11/11/17 4:58pm

purplepolitici
an

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StrangeButTrue said:

purplepolitician said:

sick over the walkie talkie n just didn't go back.

....do tell.

Nah, it wasn't a walkie talkie cop type job, just a little sales floor associate job for major retail chain. I'll tell anyways smile: My 2nd or 3rd week of working for said retail chain. I really didn't like the job anyways, I didn't know what I was doing. They had me fixing up a section of aisles in between returns n putting up stock, helping customers, etc. Whatever, what I signed up for rolleyes. First night working w/ said guy n he comes up asking me what I'd been up 2. Told em I had gotten up 2 whatever aisle which he didn't like. Went back n checked my work n came back saying this wasn't right whatever, I need 2 move faster, don't waste his/or co.'s time neutral (the last 1 got me). Maybe I was out of pocket n sensitive, maybe he has, but either way I was burnt. He went away n I called him over walkie 2 go to private line lol. I was like: U need 2 watch how u talk 2 ppl, u just met me talkin 2 me any kinda way lol. This is longer story than I meant it 2 be. He called another manager person 2 where I was at n was all belligerent. I didn't care. Place wasn't 4 me. Next shift I didn't show up.

Who got some money? dancing jig
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