Hey everyone! I haven't logged on in a while, but I still lurk from time to time, and yes, I just did one of the craziest things I can ever imagine



I was with my new lover (been dating for 2 months now), and we were getting really hot and heavy. I'm a big fan of perfoming cunnilingus, and I decided that I would show her my skill-set for the first time (yes, we have taken our relationship slow, but it's for the best. I really think I love her ).


The problem comes when I recall earlier in the day that I had consumed 3 chili dogs. They were great, but I also had dinner with my lover that night as well. While I was going down on her, I suddenly had the strong urge of having to make a really intense bowel movement (what makes it even worse is that I was laying on my stomach while doing four-play, and when I finally started the oral procedure ).


I couldn't even enjoy it, because I was trying my best to clinch my butt cheeks, while not disrupting the flow. We were both hedonistic-ally turned on, so I couldn't help it. I let a few silent poots out, and I noticed that they smelled terrible! She didn't say anything, because she was enjoying herself (I hope?).


I started to noticed that she was about to finally orgasm, but right before she did it, I thought I could slip out one more silent poot, and unfortunately......I shit myself.

I DID NOT stop pleasuring her though. I kept going, and maybe 20 seconds later, she orgasmed. I felt accomplished and embarassed at the same time . To add insult to injury, I had a towel next to me that I was going to use for clean up, so I decided that I would use that to hold against my butt, while I scurry into the bathroom (yes, I was naked...we both were). It turns out it was actually her shirt that I was using instead of the towel. The room was kind of dark......I have no other excuses for it.



To make a long story shorter, I gave her one of my shirts, she left that night, and I haven't spoken to her since. It's been three weeks now.



How can I fix this? Any suggestions?

[Edited 2/26/17 18:07pm]

quite simple really

ask her to poo on your favourite jacket while she gives you head... she'll think you're a give and take kind of person... and it will strengthen the retaionship

i'd say it's highly likely that her using a butt plug on you during foreplay is quite likely from now on

best of luck with your blossoming romance

Yawn.....another of your 'dilemas'.

http://prince.org/msg/100/399431

http://prince.org/msg/100/368096

http://prince.org/msg/100/375716

maplenpg said:

gunner82 said:

maplenpg said:

Yawn.....another of your 'dilemas'.

Look, I'm not perfect whatsoever, and it's pretty sad that all you can do is point out my flaws. I post for helpful solutions. I haven't posted in almost 4 years and I rarely ever bother anybody. Since you can provide no help, why respond? I'm hurt and it's obvious that you don't care. [Edited 2/26/17 6:21am]

Okay, if (and I very much doubt it) your dilemas are true, then you should have taken the advice of an orger 5 years ago who told you to lay off the chili. You should also really consider why you keep shitting yourself - I'd go and see a doctor. And you're right - I don't really care I'm afraid (and if you have nothing to hide them why did you change the hyperlinks?). MoBB offered you some solid advice yet you chose to reply to me - I wonder why? Just phone the girl if you're that bothered FFS - talk it through.

paisleypearl said:

Ha ha ha! You might want to use the term cunnilingus not felatio if you are pleasuring a woman. Great story though and I hope she forgives you cause you really are funny. The butt plug is a good idea. [Edited 2/26/17 14:16pm]

Thank you. I got the words mixed up. I really hope she does too. I'm so lonely now . I have never tried a butt plug before, but I will do anything it takes to get her back.

maplenpg said:

gunner82 said:

maplenpg said: Look, I'm not perfect whatsoever, and it's pretty sad that all you can do is point out my flaws. I post for helpful solutions. I haven't posted in almost 4 years and I rarely ever bother anybody. Since you can provide no help, why respond? I'm hurt and it's obvious that you don't care. [Edited 2/26/17 6:21am]

Okay, if (and I very much doubt it) your dilemas are true, then you should have taken the advice of an orger 5 years ago who told you to lay off the chili. You should also really consider why you keep shitting yourself - I'd go and see a doctor. And you're right - I don't really care I'm afraid (and if you have nothing to hide them why did you change the hyperlinks?). MoBB offered you some solid advice yet you chose to reply to me - I wonder why? Just phone the girl if you're that bothered FFS - talk it through.

I've called her numerous times....no response. I think I should just give her some space for now. Maybe she just needs time to herself.

I believe I may have a fear of making bowel movements around people and in public places. I only take pee breaks during work. I wait until I get home to take a shit. It is as if My bowels are uncontrollable when under pressure. I don't know what it is.

gunner82 said:

Hey everyone! I haven't logged on in a while, but I still lurk from time to time, and yes, I just did one of the craziest things I can ever imagine



I was with my new lover (been dating for 2 months now), and we were getting really hot and heavy. I'm a big fan of perfoming cunnilingus, and I decided that I would show her my skill-set for the first time (yes, we have taken our relationship slow, but it's for the best. I really think I love her ).


The problem comes when I recall earlier in the day that I had consumed 3 chili dogs. They were great, but I also had dinner with my lover that night as well. While I was going down on her, I suddenly had the strong urge of having to make a really intense bowel movement (what makes it even worse is that I was laying on my stomach while doing four-play, and when I finally started the oral procedure ).


I couldn't even enjoy it, because I was trying my best to clinch my butt cheeks, while not disrupting the flow. We were both hedonistic-ally turned on, so I couldn't help it. I let a few silent poots out, and I noticed that they smelled terrible! She didn't say anything, because she was enjoying herself (I hope?).


I started to noticed that she was about to finally orgasm, but right before she did it, I thought I could slip out one more silent poot, and unfortunately......I shit myself.

I DID NOT stop pleasuring her though. I kept going, and maybe 20 seconds later, she orgasmed. I felt accomplished and embarassed at the same time . To add insult to injury, I had a towel next to me that I was going to use for clean up, so I decided that I would use that to hold against my butt, while I scurry into the bathroom (yes, I was naked...we both were). It turns out it was actually her shirt that I was using instead of the towel. The room was kind of dark......I have no other excuses for it.



To make a long story shorter, I gave her one of my shirts, she left that night, and I haven't spoken to her since. It's been three weeks now.



How can I fix this? Any suggestions?

[Edited 2/26/17 18:07pm]

didnt she smell it right after u did it???

so she knew ..right???

id explain ..she came ..how can she be mad or offeneded

gunner82 said:

maplenpg said:

Okay, if (and I very much doubt it) your dilemas are true, then you should have taken the advice of an orger 5 years ago who told you to lay off the chili. You should also really consider why you keep shitting yourself - I'd go and see a doctor. And you're right - I don't really care I'm afraid (and if you have nothing to hide them why did you change the hyperlinks?). MoBB offered you some solid advice yet you chose to reply to me - I wonder why? Just phone the girl if you're that bothered FFS - talk it through.

I've called her numerous times....no response. I think I should just give her some space for now. Maybe she just needs time to herself.

I believe I may have a fear of making bowel movements around people and in public places. I only take pee breaks during work. I wait until I get home to take a shit. It is as if My bowels are uncontrollable when under pressure. I don't know what it is.

Gee whiz... I wonder why you got no response...

Clearly you need to quit eating chili. It's the root of all your problems.

Okay, next time when you know you're gonna have sex, use an enema first.

a true shit-uation!

OnlyNDaUsa said:

a true shit-uation!

I think we're a test-run before he emails these to Dear Abbey.

RodeoSchro said:

paisleypearl said:

RodeoSchro said:

I think we're a test-run before he emails these to Dear Abbey.

You may have misturd him, it's not just a crappy cry for sympathy.

paisleypearl said:

RodeoSchro said:

I think we're a test-run before he emails these to Dear Abbey.

You may have misturd him, it's not just a crappy cry for sympathy.

I read some of his other threads. This poor guy has crapped his pants even more than Ted Nugent has!

luvsexy4all said:

gunner82 said:

Hey everyone! I haven't logged on in a while, but I still lurk from time to time, and yes, I just did one of the craziest things I can ever imagine



I was with my new lover (been dating for 2 months now), and we were getting really hot and heavy. I'm a big fan of perfoming cunnilingus, and I decided that I would show her my skill-set for the first time (yes, we have taken our relationship slow, but it's for the best. I really think I love her ).


The problem comes when I recall earlier in the day that I had consumed 3 chili dogs. They were great, but I also had dinner with my lover that night as well. While I was going down on her, I suddenly had the strong urge of having to make a really intense bowel movement (what makes it even worse is that I was laying on my stomach while doing four-play, and when I finally started the oral procedure ).


I couldn't even enjoy it, because I was trying my best to clinch my butt cheeks, while not disrupting the flow. We were both hedonistic-ally turned on, so I couldn't help it. I let a few silent poots out, and I noticed that they smelled terrible! She didn't say anything, because she was enjoying herself (I hope?).


I started to noticed that she was about to finally orgasm, but right before she did it, I thought I could slip out one more silent poot, and unfortunately......I shit myself.

I DID NOT stop pleasuring her though. I kept going, and maybe 20 seconds later, she orgasmed. I felt accomplished and embarassed at the same time . To add insult to injury, I had a towel next to me that I was going to use for clean up, so I decided that I would use that to hold against my butt, while I scurry into the bathroom (yes, I was naked...we both were). It turns out it was actually her shirt that I was using instead of the towel. The room was kind of dark......I have no other excuses for it.



To make a long story shorter, I gave her one of my shirts, she left that night, and I haven't spoken to her since. It's been three weeks now.



How can I fix this? Any suggestions?

[Edited 2/26/17 18:07pm]

didnt she smell it right after u did it???

so she knew ..right???

id explain ..she came ..how can she be mad or offeneded

I couldn't believe that she didn't smell the awful gas I let out during the oral session. I did ruin her shirt too. I still have questions myself. I'm still giving her some time.

purplethunder3121 said:

gunner82 said:

I've called her numerous times....no response. I think I should just give her some space for now. Maybe she just needs time to herself.

I believe I may have a fear of making bowel movements around people and in public places. I only take pee breaks during work. I wait until I get home to take a shit. It is as if My bowels are uncontrollable when under pressure. I don't know what it is.

Gee whiz... I wonder why you got no response...

I hadn't had that happen to me since the last time I posted. I thought I had it under control.

RodeoSchro said:

Clearly you need to quit eating chili. It's the root of all your problems.

I think it could be a problem. It's weird though, because I have never had problems with chili, until the previous posts I made here.

RodeoSchro said:

paisleypearl said:

RodeoSchro said: You may have misturd him, it's not just a crappy cry for sympathy.

I read some of his other threads. This poor guy has crapped his pants even more than Ted Nugent has!

Happy ending, crappy ending what's the difference?

gunner82 said:

RodeoSchro said:

Clearly you need to quit eating chili. It's the root of all your problems.

I think it could be a problem. It's weird though, because I have never had problems with chili, until the previous posts I made here.

I had the same thing happen with bananas. I've enjoyed bananas my whole life...until two years ago. Since then, bananas make me immediately throw up. I have no idea why, but it's happened every time I've eaten a banana in the last two years. Thankfully I am a quick learner so after the second experience, I've avoided bananas completely, and plan to never eat another banana again.

But I still have no idea why I now have such an immediate and violent reaction to bananas.

Just stop eating and go shit

My wife made a big pot of chili last night and I just had a bowl of it. Should any pooptastic events occur, I'll be sure to keep them to myself!

.

[Edited 3/3/17 11:48am]

RodeoSchro said:

My wife made a big pot of chili last night and I just had a bowl of it. Should any pooptastic events occur, I'll be sure to keep them to myself!

.

[Edited 3/3/17 11:48am]

I love a good bowel of chili!


or is it a bowel moving bowl of chili...

RodeoSchro said: