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Thread started 08/10/14 8:36am

paintedlady

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Opinion poll on a dying wish

My kids never saw their grandmother... on their father's side.

I wanted them to get to know her, reached out. Wrote letters, found her on FB and tried to friend her and her daughters.

I never married her son, and her son must have painted an ugly image of me to her, so she blocked me on FB. Her daughters never friended me at all.... so my kids never met any of them.

Their father only shows up twice a year for birthdays and Christmas only... and acts as if he's doing my kids a huge favor by doing so.

One time he did show up drunk after 1opm from a family cookout he didn't bring his kids to, he was hanging all over our daughter, all extra creepy like and I checked him. This is the ONLY time he mentioned any cookout with his family, this was a few years ago and I was angry that he didn't think to bring his children to meet his family.

The few times I did meet the mother of my "babydaddy" she hit me up for cash and I told her I couldn't help her, so she whipped out a catalog of crap for me to "support her with" and I spent over a 100.00 USD on stuff I would never buy otherwise.

She is a smoker, survivor of breast cancer and she drinks too... now all this has caught up to her and now has lung cancer. She is dying, and my kids father wants our children to see her.



I am angry he requested to do this, I do not want this to be my kids only memory of their grandmother, I'd rather they have no memory at all of her than a sick and half dead person gasping for air.

If she turned them away when she was healthy, why see them now? What would you do? Am I unreasonable?

CRAP.... I didn't want that stupid smiley face on the title... my mistake.

[Edited 8/10/14 8:40am]

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Reply #1 posted 08/10/14 10:17am

morningsong

Me, I'd talk to my children and let them decide.
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Reply #2 posted 08/10/14 11:33am

paintedlady

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morningsong said:

Me, I'd talk to my children and let them decide.

They are 12 and 14....

they never met a dying person before.

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Reply #3 posted 08/10/14 11:55am

morningsong

paintedlady said:



morningsong said:


Me, I'd talk to my children and let them decide.

They are 12 and 14....



they never met a dying person before.


I wouldn't want them to go. I understand your feelings completely. I would feel I wouldn't want my kids resentments being the one denying them the opportunity to see their blood. They're not toddlers but I'd explain it wouldn't be pretty as best as possible
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Reply #4 posted 08/10/14 12:00pm

paintedlady

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morningsong said:

paintedlady said:

They are 12 and 14....

they never met a dying person before.

I wouldn't want them to go. I understand your feelings completely. I would feel I wouldn't want my kids resentments being the one denying them the opportunity to see their blood. They're not toddlers but I'd explain it wouldn't be pretty as best as possible

I never denied them seeing their blood, so I am good with that.

That women never wanted to see my kids, even though I asked their dad to take them to see her repeatedly.

I am very resentful about her dying and now wanting to be comforted at the risk of tramautizing my children so she can die in peace leaving my kids with just a bad memory of her taht causes them to cry or get depressed.

I'd rather my kids have no memory of her than just one sad one.

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Reply #5 posted 08/10/14 12:05pm

paintedlady

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I know I sound stubborn, but I am actually thinking about what you said morningsong, thank you.

hug I just need to get to a place where I am not so angry and wishing her to burn in the depths of hell.

I want to smother that heffa with a pillow myself. Seriously, I am that angry, because I reached out in vain to her and this is the only consideration she gives my kids is a "good-bye".

sigh I need help not being so angry.

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Reply #6 posted 08/10/14 1:17pm

MoBettaBliss

the anger/hurt you feel is totally understandable... but you need to find a way to put that aside and think clearly

me?... i'd be inclined to not want them to go... not out of spite... but because she's never wanted to be there for them ... people don't have strange rights over kids because they're somehow related... relationships are earned over time... she chose not to put the effort in to do that

at the end of the day though, i would discuss it with my kids... i'd tell them how i felt about it, and that they are under no obligation to go and see this person.... if they made it clear that they really wanted to, i'd support them to do that

and if they decide not to, i'd shut their dad down in a second if he tried to lay a guilt trip on them

as far as hime being 'creepy' drunk around your daughter... i'd be keeping a real close eye on that

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Reply #7 posted 08/10/14 2:31pm

paintedlady

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MoBettaBliss said:

the anger/hurt you feel is totally understandable... but you need to find a way to put that aside and think clearly

me?... i'd be inclined to not want them to go... not out of spite... but because she's never wanted to be there for them ... people don't have strange rights over kids because they're somehow related... relationships are earned over time... she chose not to put the effort in to do that

at the end of the day though, i would discuss it with my kids... i'd tell them how i felt about it, and that they are under no obligation to go and see this person.... if they made it clear that they really wanted to, i'd support them to do that

and if they decide not to, i'd shut their dad down in a second if he tried to lay a guilt trip on them

as far as hime being 'creepy' drunk around your daughter... i'd be keeping a real close eye on that

Thanks smile

I think dad badmouthed me to his mom when I sued him for child support... he only sees them on birthdays and Christmas, so he was never good at reaching out to his kids.

He always put their needs last... this is a running theme in his family it seems because I tried to get their father to get his kids to his mother, sisters, and brothers.

My children have not met ANY people on his side of the family. I found them on FB. I friended his mom, she blocked me soon after, never giving me a reason why. So then I had no way of reaching her since I don't know her address or phone number, his sisters (3 of them, my kids aunties) all never friended me at all, despite me trying to pm them to meet up with them to introduce my kids to them.

I gave up.

My kids (especially my son) cries when our pet fish die, he is a sensitive one and was depressed about his father. I JUST got him in a good place.

sigh My daughter is the "tough one" she'll easily say "I don't know that lady, pfft.... I don't want to see her'.....but my son has always been that kid who doesn't do well with rejection, he beats himself up about his father. He would stand by the door crying for hours waiting on a father who would decide not to show. My son finally stopped being that way.

I am scared for my son's mental health regarding seeing his ailing grandmother... and angry his father put him in that position to have to face such a decision.

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Reply #8 posted 08/10/14 2:36pm

paintedlady

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Imma need some damn therapy after this shit... wishing old bitches would hurry up and die already.

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Reply #9 posted 08/10/14 2:39pm

MoBettaBliss

paintedlady said:

MoBettaBliss said:

the anger/hurt you feel is totally understandable... but you need to find a way to put that aside and think clearly

me?... i'd be inclined to not want them to go... not out of spite... but because she's never wanted to be there for them ... people don't have strange rights over kids because they're somehow related... relationships are earned over time... she chose not to put the effort in to do that

at the end of the day though, i would discuss it with my kids... i'd tell them how i felt about it, and that they are under no obligation to go and see this person.... if they made it clear that they really wanted to, i'd support them to do that

and if they decide not to, i'd shut their dad down in a second if he tried to lay a guilt trip on them

as far as hime being 'creepy' drunk around your daughter... i'd be keeping a real close eye on that

Thanks smile

I think dad badmouthed me to his mom when I sued him for child support... he only sees them on birthdays and Christmas, so he was never good at reaching out to his kids.

He always put their needs last... this is a running theme in his family it seems because I tried to get their father to get his kids to his mother, sisters, and brothers.

My children have not met ANY people on his side of the family. I found them on FB. I friended his mom, she blocked me soon after, never giving me a reason why. So then I had no way of reaching her since I don't know her address or phone number, his sisters (3 of them, my kids aunties) all never friended me at all, despite me trying to pm them to meet up with them to introduce my kids to them.

I gave up.

My kids (especially my son) cries when our pet fish die, he is a sensitive one and was depressed about his father. I JUST got him in a good place.

sigh My daughter is the "tough one" she'll easily say "I don't know that lady, pfft.... I don't want to see her'.....but my son has always been that kid who doesn't do well with rejection, he beats himself up about his father. He would stand by the door crying for hours waiting on a father who would decide not to show. My son finally stopped being that way.

I am scared for my son's mental health regarding seeing his ailing grandmother... and angry his father put him in that position to have to face such a decision.



then if you think it would be detrimental to your son, i wouldn't allow it... you know your kids better than anyone

people are a trip... i have no time for dudes like your ex... or any adult that can't put the needs of kids first


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Reply #10 posted 08/10/14 3:57pm

Stymie

Nope my kids wouldn't go. People do dirt all their lives and in the end try to get some act right. Fuck that.
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Reply #11 posted 08/10/14 4:35pm

wildgoldenhone
y

I agree with not letting them go to see her while she is dying.

But it doesn't mean that you cannot try to let them meet the aunties later on (in the future, when no one is dying), if circumstances are right and if everyone is willing. At least they'll know who their family is and not end up marrying their cousin or something.

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Reply #12 posted 08/10/14 5:31pm

HuMpThAnG

hug

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Reply #13 posted 08/10/14 5:38pm

babynoz

paintedlady said:

My kids never saw their grandmother... on their father's side.

I wanted them to get to know her, reached out. Wrote letters, found her on FB and tried to friend her and her daughters.

I never married her son, and her son must have painted an ugly image of me to her, so she blocked me on FB. Her daughters never friended me at all.... so my kids never met any of them.

Their father only shows up twice a year for birthdays and Christmas only... and acts as if he's doing my kids a huge favor by doing so.

One time he did show up drunk after 1opm from a family cookout he didn't bring his kids to, he was hanging all over our daughter, all extra creepy like and I checked him. This is the ONLY time he mentioned any cookout with his family, this was a few years ago and I was angry that he didn't think to bring his children to meet his family.

The few times I did meet the mother of my "babydaddy" she hit me up for cash and I told her I couldn't help her, so she whipped out a catalog of crap for me to "support her with" and I spent over a 100.00 USD on stuff I would never buy otherwise.

She is a smoker, survivor of breast cancer and she drinks too... now all this has caught up to her and now has lung cancer. She is dying, and my kids father wants our children to see her.



I am angry he requested to do this, I do not want this to be my kids only memory of their grandmother, I'd rather they have no memory at all of her than a sick and half dead person gasping for air.

If she turned them away when she was healthy, why see them now? What would you do? Am I unreasonable?

CRAP.... I didn't want that stupid smiley face on the title... my mistake.

[Edited 8/10/14 8:40am]



The bolded part is my problem. Not once did you say that granny herself is asking for the kids. Is this her idea or the ex?

Because, he absolutely does not get to use the kids to assuage his guilt so the very first thing to do is find out whose idea this was.

By all means explain granny's situation to the kids and let them know that they are under no obligation to accomodate people they don't even know even if they are family. Pay special attention to your son to help him understand that people who neglect or manipulate him are the ones with the problem, not him.

Tell that POS ex of yours that you'll be happy to put him and granny on the prayer list at church but he will not be allowed to manipulate the children.

I wouldn't be surprised if he has his family thinking that you wont let him see his kids or something like that. He had to have made up some lies for them to treat you like that all this time.

Prince, in you I found a kindred spirit...Rest In Paradise.
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Reply #14 posted 08/10/14 6:24pm

XxAxX

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i'd explain things and ask them what they want. since they're your kids, they're probably pretty smart

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Reply #15 posted 08/10/14 6:49pm

paintedlady

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babynoz said:

paintedlady said:

My kids never saw their grandmother... on their father's side.

I wanted them to get to know her, reached out. Wrote letters, found her on FB and tried to friend her and her daughters.

I never married her son, and her son must have painted an ugly image of me to her, so she blocked me on FB. Her daughters never friended me at all.... so my kids never met any of them.

Their father only shows up twice a year for birthdays and Christmas only... and acts as if he's doing my kids a huge favor by doing so.

One time he did show up drunk after 1opm from a family cookout he didn't bring his kids to, he was hanging all over our daughter, all extra creepy like and I checked him. This is the ONLY time he mentioned any cookout with his family, this was a few years ago and I was angry that he didn't think to bring his children to meet his family.

The few times I did meet the mother of my "babydaddy" she hit me up for cash and I told her I couldn't help her, so she whipped out a catalog of crap for me to "support her with" and I spent over a 100.00 USD on stuff I would never buy otherwise.

She is a smoker, survivor of breast cancer and she drinks too... now all this has caught up to her and now has lung cancer. She is dying, and my kids father wants our children to see her.



I am angry he requested to do this, I do not want this to be my kids only memory of their grandmother, I'd rather they have no memory at all of her than a sick and half dead person gasping for air.

If she turned them away when she was healthy, why see them now? What would you do? Am I unreasonable?

CRAP.... I didn't want that stupid smiley face on the title... my mistake.

[Edited 8/10/14 8:40am]



The bolded part is my problem. Not once did you say that granny herself is asking for the kids. Is this her idea or the ex?

Because, he absolutely does not get to use the kids to assuage his guilt so the very first thing to do is find out whose idea this was.

By all means explain granny's situation to the kids and let them know that they are under no obligation to accomodate people they don't even know even if they are family. Pay special attention to your son to help him understand that people who neglect or manipulate him are the ones with the problem, not him.

Tell that POS ex of yours that you'll be happy to put him and granny on the prayer list at church but he will not be allowed to manipulate the children.

I wouldn't be surprised if he has his family thinking that you wont let him see his kids or something like that. He had to have made up some lies for them to treat you like that all this time.

At my son's birthday party his father openly annouced that his mother is dying and that the kids must see her. I have ZERO access to her, I tried friending her and she blocked me on FB.

To this day I really don't know why, I sent continuous messages to my kids aunts that I also found on FB they will not respond to me. They treat me as if I am a total stranger with no connection to them.




I was upset that my kid's mostly absentee father announced something so sensitive in front of everyone. It pissed me off, but I kept calm about it so as not to upset my kids. My older son who is 23 and his girlfriend seemed shocked at the announcement, I quickly distracted them by changing the subject -running interference like I usually do.

I honestly believe he dogged me to his family, and I agree with every theory you have on this. The prayer list from church is a great idea.

I am not currently in a church home but I kno9w 3 different pastors and still pray and do prayer vigils constantly for loved ones and those who just need lifting up.

hug

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Reply #16 posted 08/10/14 6:51pm

paintedlady

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wildgoldenhoney said:

I agree with not letting them go to see her while she is dying.

But it doesn't mean that you cannot try to let them meet the aunties later on (in the future, when no one is dying), if circumstances are right and if everyone is willing. At least they'll know who their family is and not end up marrying their cousin or something.

THIS is the main reason I felt it was VERY important for the cousins to kinow one another... but their dad has total control of that situation and I tried to reach out.

I really think he soured them against me.

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Reply #17 posted 08/10/14 6:55pm

Beautifulstarr
123

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MoBettaBliss said:



paintedlady said:




MoBettaBliss said:


the anger/hurt you feel is totally understandable... but you need to find a way to put that aside and think clearly

me?... i'd be inclined to not want them to go... not out of spite... but because she's never wanted to be there for them ... people don't have strange rights over kids because they're somehow related... relationships are earned over time... she chose not to put the effort in to do that

at the end of the day though, i would discuss it with my kids... i'd tell them how i felt about it, and that they are under no obligation to go and see this person.... if they made it clear that they really wanted to, i'd support them to do that


and if they decide not to, i'd shut their dad down in a second if he tried to lay a guilt trip on them

as far as hime being 'creepy' drunk around your daughter... i'd be keeping a real close eye on that




Thanks smile



I think dad badmouthed me to his mom when I sued him for child support... he only sees them on birthdays and Christmas, so he was never good at reaching out to his kids.



He always put their needs last... this is a running theme in his family it seems because I tried to get their father to get his kids to his mother, sisters, and brothers.



My children have not met ANY people on his side of the family. I found them on FB. I friended his mom, she blocked me soon after, never giving me a reason why. So then I had no way of reaching her since I don't know her address or phone number, his sisters (3 of them, my kids aunties) all never friended me at all, despite me trying to pm them to meet up with them to introduce my kids to them.



I gave up.



My kids (especially my son) cries when our pet fish die, he is a sensitive one and was depressed about his father. I JUST got him in a good place.



sigh My daughter is the "tough one" she'll easily say "I don't know that lady, pfft.... I don't want to see her'.....but my son has always been that kid who doesn't do well with rejection, he beats himself up about his father. He would stand by the door crying for hours waiting on a father who would decide not to show. My son finally stopped being that way.



I am scared for my son's mental health regarding seeing his ailing grandmother... and angry his father put him in that position to have to face such a decision.









then if you think it would be detrimental to your son, i wouldn't allow it... you know your kids better than anyone

people are a trip... i have no time for dudes like your ex... or any adult that can't put the needs of kids first



I agree.
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Reply #18 posted 08/10/14 6:58pm

SuperFurryAnim
al

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She only knows what her son told her. So forgiveness. So what she smokes, drinks that is addiction. Explain the situation to the kids and let them decide. Life is fuct and I doubt meeting the gram will fuk the kids up anymore than poc father but at end of day that is the kids father and grandmom. If the kids don't grow up to be fukups that's what matters. Make it a lesson, look this is where you end up drinking and smoking.
Good luck,
Ann Landers
What are you outraged about today? CNN has not told you yet?
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Reply #19 posted 08/10/14 7:03pm

Beautifulstarr
123

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...also, this man should realize that one day, he could be put in the same predicament as his mother, being on his deathbed. Therefore, he should do right by your kids, starting now. Not to bad mouth anyone, but it appears to me that your ex and family are very immature and unreasonable people. To block you from facebook, that's very foul.
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Reply #20 posted 08/10/14 7:26pm

paintedlady

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SuperFurryAnimal said:

She only knows what her son told her. So forgiveness. So what she smokes, drinks that is addiction. Explain the situation to the kids and let them decide. Life is fuct and I doubt meeting the gram will fuk the kids up anymore than poc father but at end of day that is the kids father and grandmom. If the kids don't grow up to be fukups that's what matters. Make it a lesson, look this is where you end up drinking and smoking. Good luck, Ann Landers

I don't smoke, I am kind to that bastard that I foolishly chose to love, so I picked that asshole and I eat crow and pay for it everyday and explain things to them as best as I can so there is no guilt or pain tossed on my kids.

They still love their father, I teach them to honor their parents... even good ol' absentee dad.

As far as teaching them a life lesson, well I don't want the only memory of grandma to be of tubes and sickly smells and a wrinkled form that isn't "her" anymore but a shell of her.

It isn't the woman I met, all fiesty and hitting me up for cash and puffing smoke in your face while she shared funny stories. My kids won't know that... just a half dead person gasping for air. sad I don't want them to only know that.

How can kids decide something with out the wisdom to make a proper choice?

I wish my kids met her before the "dying" point, what's the sense now?

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Reply #21 posted 08/10/14 7:28pm

babynoz

paintedlady said:

babynoz said:



The bolded part is my problem. Not once did you say that granny herself is asking for the kids. Is this her idea or the ex?

Because, he absolutely does not get to use the kids to assuage his guilt so the very first thing to do is find out whose idea this was.

By all means explain granny's situation to the kids and let them know that they are under no obligation to accomodate people they don't even know even if they are family. Pay special attention to your son to help him understand that people who neglect or manipulate him are the ones with the problem, not him.

Tell that POS ex of yours that you'll be happy to put him and granny on the prayer list at church but he will not be allowed to manipulate the children.

I wouldn't be surprised if he has his family thinking that you wont let him see his kids or something like that. He had to have made up some lies for them to treat you like that all this time.

At my son's birthday party his father openly annouced that his mother is dying and that the kids must see her. I have ZERO access to her, I tried friending her and she blocked me on FB.

To this day I really don't know why, I sent continuous messages to my kids aunts that I also found on FB they will not respond to me. They treat me as if I am a total stranger with no connection to them.




I was upset that my kid's mostly absentee father announced something so sensitive in front of everyone. It pissed me off, but I kept calm about it so as not to upset my kids. My older son who is 23 and his girlfriend seemed shocked at the announcement, I quickly distracted them by changing the subject -running interference like I usually do.

I honestly believe he dogged me to his family, and I agree with every theory you have on this. The prayer list from church is a great idea.

I am not currently in a church home but I kno9w 3 different pastors and still pray and do prayer vigils constantly for loved ones and those who just need lifting up.

hug



Gurl....you're holding up well, hug

Give your condolences and let him know in no uncertain terms that your kids are not gonna be pawns in his chess game.

It sounds like this is all his doing and his family may not have any idea what's been going on. People will pull all kinds of stunts to make themselves look good and hide their sorry ass conniving from others.

He wants to play the part of the doting dad for show in front of the relatives now that they're all going to gather around granny and might start asking questions.

He seems like the type that needs to be fed with a long handled spoon.

Prince, in you I found a kindred spirit...Rest In Paradise.
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Reply #22 posted 08/10/14 7:30pm

paintedlady

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Beautifulstarr123 said:

...also, this man should realize that one day, he could be put in the same predicament as his mother, being on his deathbed. Therefore, he should do right by your kids, starting now. Not to bad mouth anyone, but it appears to me that your ex and family are very immature and unreasonable people. To block you from facebook, that's very foul.

This helps fuel my anger...

bitches didn't think enough about my kids to want to meet them and invite them to the cookouts and parties and dinners, but now you want to think about them when you're dying?

I thnk good ol' dad did permanent damage, he also has a 21 year old daughter with another mother he has zero contact with... he completely abandoned her.

sad My kids don't know her either, I am still trying to find her, I remain hopeful with that situation.

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Reply #23 posted 08/10/14 7:33pm

paintedlady

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babynoz said:

paintedlady said:

At my son's birthday party his father openly annouced that his mother is dying and that the kids must see her. I have ZERO access to her, I tried friending her and she blocked me on FB.

To this day I really don't know why, I sent continuous messages to my kids aunts that I also found on FB they will not respond to me. They treat me as if I am a total stranger with no connection to them.




I was upset that my kid's mostly absentee father announced something so sensitive in front of everyone. It pissed me off, but I kept calm about it so as not to upset my kids. My older son who is 23 and his girlfriend seemed shocked at the announcement, I quickly distracted them by changing the subject -running interference like I usually do.

I honestly believe he dogged me to his family, and I agree with every theory you have on this. The prayer list from church is a great idea.

I am not currently in a church home but I kno9w 3 different pastors and still pray and do prayer vigils constantly for loved ones and those who just need lifting up.

hug



Gurl....you're holding up well, hug

Give your condolences and let him know in no uncertain terms that your kids are not gonna be pawns in his chess game.

It sounds like this is all his doing and his family may not have any idea what's been going on. People will pull all kinds of stunts to make themselves look good and hide their sorry ass conniving from others.

He wants to play the part of the doting dad for show in front of the relatives now that they're all going to gather around granny and might start asking questions.

He seems like the type that needs to be fed with a long handled spoon.

YES he is!

He's a tempermantal guy to, any little thing sets him off and he disappears.

I have a "kit-glove" approach to dealing with him. sigh

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Reply #24 posted 08/10/14 7:34pm

paintedlady

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grouphug

Thank you also Stymie, Humpthang, and XxaxX... your support means a lot... all of you actually.

cry

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Reply #25 posted 08/11/14 6:35am

Fauxie

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MoBettaBliss said:

the anger/hurt you feel is totally understandable... but you need to find a way to put that aside and think clearly

me?... i'd be inclined to not want them to go... not out of spite... but because she's never wanted to be there for them ... people don't have strange rights over kids because they're somehow related... relationships are earned over time... she chose not to put the effort in to do that

at the end of the day though, i would discuss it with my kids... i'd tell them how i felt about it, and that they are under no obligation to go and see this person.... if they made it clear that they really wanted to, i'd support them to do that

and if they decide not to, i'd shut their dad down in a second if he tried to lay a guilt trip on them

as far as hime being 'creepy' drunk around your daughter... i'd be keeping a real close eye on that


I think this is all great advice.


Good luck, paintedlady. hug

MY COUSIN WORKS IN A PHARMACY AND SHE SAID THEY ENEMA'D PRANCE INTO OBLIVION WITH FENTONILS!!
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Reply #26 posted 08/11/14 7:56am

Slave2daGroove

Fauxie said:

MoBettaBliss said:

the anger/hurt you feel is totally understandable... but you need to find a way to put that aside and think clearly

me?... i'd be inclined to not want them to go... not out of spite... but because she's never wanted to be there for them ... people don't have strange rights over kids because they're somehow related... relationships are earned over time... she chose not to put the effort in to do that

at the end of the day though, i would discuss it with my kids... i'd tell them how i felt about it, and that they are under no obligation to go and see this person.... if they made it clear that they really wanted to, i'd support them to do that

and if they decide not to, i'd shut their dad down in a second if he tried to lay a guilt trip on them

as far as hime being 'creepy' drunk around your daughter... i'd be keeping a real close eye on that


I think this is all great advice.


Good luck, paintedlady. hug

Mobetta has said better then I could and covered all the bases...

I had a similiar thing with my own father and while I hear the word "forgiveness" being used in situations like this, one has to be a father to be be forgiven as a father. As a man, when you show up once a year, you are not a father. Maybe you are with the other family you started but that has nothing to do with me. Grandmas fit into that category as well, in my experience, about to die or alive.

A big hug to all the woman of this world who make amaizng people by themselves! You are all an inspiration to mankind!

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Reply #27 posted 08/11/14 8:47am

TD3

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No.


Some 11th hour drama which could have been avoided if your kids grandmother wanted toand made an effort to have a relationship with her grandchildren. Deathbead reunions can't and don't make up for relationships that never existed.
You reached out to her and her family, their father should have made sure your children knew his people. Nothing from nothing leaves, nothing.

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Reply #28 posted 08/11/14 10:52am

Beautifulstarr
123

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paintedlady said:



Beautifulstarr123 said:


...also, this man should realize that one day, he could be put in the same predicament as his mother, being on his deathbed. Therefore, he should do right by your kids, starting now. Not to bad mouth anyone, but it appears to me that your ex and family are very immature and unreasonable people. To block you from facebook, that's very foul.


This helps fuel my anger...



bitches didn't think enough about my kids to want to meet them and invite them to the cookouts and parties and dinners, but now you want to think about them when you're dying?





I thnk good ol' dad did permanent damage, he also has a 21 year old daughter with another mother he has zero contact with... he completely abandoned her.



sad My kids don't know her either, I am still trying to find her, I remain hopeful with that situation.




At the end of the day, it's your decision on this, and I hope that it turns out to be the right one. The best of wishes and luck to you, including your search for your kids older sister ;-)

...and continue to be that pillow of strength for your kids thumbs up! Facebook is of the devil, sometimes razz
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Reply #29 posted 08/11/14 10:55am

Revolution

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you are right...you are the one raising those kids full time. Your word should be the last one.

Thanks for the laughs, arguments and overall enjoyment for the last umpteen years. It's time for me to retire from Prince.org and engage in the real world...lol. Above all, I appreciated the talent Prince. You were one of a kind.
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