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Thread started 09/26/07 7:50am

shellyevon

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Word game

I saw this the other day. The Washington Post has a yearly contest where readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for various words -- and the winners were: . . .


1. Coffee (n.), a person who is coughed upon.

2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you
have gained.

3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat
stomach.

4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.

5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.

6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you
absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.

7. Lymph (v), to walk with a lisp.

8. Gargoyle (n.), an olive-flavored mouthwash.

9. Flatulence (n.) the emergency vehicle that picks you up
after you are run over by a steamroller.

10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.

11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.

12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified demeanor assumed
by a proctologist immediately before he examines you.

13. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation
with Yiddish expressions.

14. Pokemon (n), A Jamaican proctologist.

15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), The belief that, when you die,
your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck there.



So do you have any ro add to the list?
"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"-Dr Seuss

Pain is something to carry, like a radio...You should stand up for your right to feel your pain- Jim Morrison
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Reply #1 posted 09/26/07 8:02am

thefrog

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cloud (n): a tw...

buster (n): ...at

smile
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Reply #2 posted 09/26/07 8:38am

emm

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flatulence giggle that one was funny

cop
doveShe couldn't stop crying 'cause she knew he was gone to stay dove
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Reply #3 posted 09/26/07 8:43am

retina

canadian - able to assist mr holm

american - a happy metal cylinder

spaniard - cover the distance of 91 centimetres

pakistani - put the curly red haired girl from asia in a bag

portuguese - unfortunate couple of birds

sudanese - press charges against the brother's daughter

smile
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Reply #4 posted 09/26/07 9:09am

emm

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retina said:

portuguese - unfortunate couple of birds
smile


falloff love it.



ok ummm... dunce

kentucky - ability to hide house key between your bosom

carpet - that little bobblehead dog on your dashboard
doveShe couldn't stop crying 'cause she knew he was gone to stay dove
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Reply #5 posted 09/26/07 9:11am

purpleundergro
und

Homogenize (v.), when "gays" in fact do convert "straights."

Gymnastics (v.), masturbation in the locker room or shower of the gym.

Crumudgeon (n.), the residual smear left on clothing after you try to brush-off food crumbs.

Craigslist (n.), Sen. Larry Craig's list of favorite DL public restrooms.

Minister (v), to stir quickly for only one or two strokes.

Bisexuality (v.), the act of having to pay for sex.

Chris Rock (n.), abbreviation for Christian Rock music.

Hairlip (n.), that stray pubic hair that always seems to find its way to the mouth.

Follicle (adj.), to behave in an extremely jovial way that inspires folly.

Debutante (v.), the teasing of a girl named 'Debbie.'

Judaism (n.), the cult following of anyone named 'Judy.'

Gynocology (n.), what a woman thinks she knows about the male species.

Nuptuals (n.), an extremely large pair of round breasts.

Nipples (n.), a convenient snack food.

Retard (v.), to tar again.

Fingernail (v.), to poke repeatedly with the finger.

Hard-On (n.), from the makers of Head-On, apply directly to the....

Hassellhoff (v.), to harrass to the point of drinking and binge-eating on video.

Elipses (n.), the labia.

Silicone (n.), that funny-looking pointy-bra worn by Madonna during the "Truth or Dare" era.

Leotard (v.), when Leo tarred it.

Rectal Appendectomy (n.), the medical procedure to remove one's ass from the lips of another following an ass-kissing.

Cranial Appendectomy (n.), the medical procedure to remove one's head from his/her own ass.


That's all I've got for now!
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Reply #6 posted 09/26/07 10:27am

retina

emm said:

retina said:

portuguese - unfortunate couple of birds
smile


falloff love it.


Thanks. smile


ok ummm... dunce

kentucky - ability to hide house key between your bosom


You have plenty of Kentucky I bet. wink
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Reply #7 posted 09/26/07 6:18pm

shellyevon

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thefrog said:

cloud (n): a tw...

buster (n): ...at

smile


lol
"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"-Dr Seuss

Pain is something to carry, like a radio...You should stand up for your right to feel your pain- Jim Morrison
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Reply #8 posted 09/26/07 6:35pm

shellyevon

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Copulation - Sex between consenting policemen.

paradox-two physicians

Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

Cobra: A brasseire for conjoined twins.
[Edited 9/26/07 18:41pm]
"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"-Dr Seuss

Pain is something to carry, like a radio...You should stand up for your right to feel your pain- Jim Morrison
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Reply #9 posted 09/27/07 5:46am

purpleundergro
und

Penal system (n.), the male reproductive system.

TicketMaster (n.), the supreme god of concert-going basically in charge of your whole enjoyment of the show.

Polterguist (v.), to ask your wife or mother repeatedly where something is until she gets frustrated and finally shows you herself. ("Honey, where's the mustard?")

Tofu (n.), a foot fetish that is limited to only the toes.

Kung-fu (n.), cunnilingus.

Fungus (n.), fun with any guy named 'Gus.'
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Reply #10 posted 09/27/07 5:49am

Cloudbuster

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thefrog said:

cloud (n): a tw...

buster (n): ...at

smile


lol
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